Bob Hoskins

(person) by fondue Sun Nov 19 2000 at 0:01:55
Distinguished English actor, star of such films as Who Framed Roger Rabbit, The Long Good Friday and Mona Lisa. Also "starred" in the disasterous Super Mario Brothers movie. A few years ago, he was paid an obscene amount of money to advertise British Telecom. His ads generally involved him talking smug marketing bollocks to camera while actors who couldn't see him used the phone to avert many cliched disasters. The adverts would always end with Bob telling us in a grating Cockney accent "It's good to talk".

Hoskin's extreme cockney typecasting and penchant for appearing in low-budget independent films at a reduced fee prompted Adam and Joe to write a fantastic song about him. Bob (played by Adam Buxton) is portrayed as a saintly, do-gooding rough diamond in a Dickensian London setting. The lyrics are a list of silly "authentic" cockney sayings, ("Tickle me fancy, 'ave a banana, wot a palaver") quickly descending into brilliant parody ("rattle me spoonies" "nibble me nob" "jelly me eels" "buckets of fun and a barrel of laughs") and a full list of his films rendered into cockney sayings ("Roger me rabbit, Mona me Lisa, Mer me maids, Blue me Ice ..."), and then finishing with the cry of "Spank me behind for just two-and-six!"

Download it here : http://www.poopages.dircon.co.uk/download/download.html

Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.