Everything2
Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Full Text
Everything2

Elephant penis joke

created by Ex Machina

(idea) by Sesquipedalian (3.3 mon) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Tue May 01 2001 at 14:33:34

There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.

"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says. "The bad news is that the muscles around your penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."

The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure. "So what's the good news?" he asks.

The doctor says: "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"

The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it."

So the doctor performs the operation. A few weeks later, the guy takes his girlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. While sitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful. Seeking relief, he reaches down and unzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.

Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.

"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend, "That was impressive! Can you do that again?"

Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably ... but I don't know if I can fit another dinner roll up my ass!"

joke obtained from www.goodlaughter.com. 'Twas a newbie mistake that I cannot bear to remedy.


printable version
chaos

My parents conspire to make me a porn star Pam and Tommy's home video What's it like having a curved penis? penis
C Programming Tips and Tricks Does porn increase the self-perceived value of pussy? Bulbous You wear your breasts to their full extent
that old Philip Glass knock knock joke Oral sex How to calm a cat in heat zoophilia
Elephant naked Porn Star 8 Inch Disk
The Sexuality of Christ in Renaissance Art and in Modern Oblivion Penis size Which party wants to deny you your freedoms next? Ozymandias
gynomammophallitis counting 1 bits C implementations phoque Cryptozoology
Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.
  Epicenter
Login
Password

password reminder
register

Everything2 Help

Cool Staff Picks
What you are reading:
Steve Allen
Aztec Empire
Arrow
John Keats
Piobaireachd
Take the skinheads drinking
Borderline personality disorder
Planetary Linguistics
Ash Wednesday
G.I. Joe Public Service Announcements
The Library Book
Is file sharing theft?
Georg Hegel
New Writeups
trixingee
Dungeon Mastering for the first time(idea)
Netrat0
It's Called Subtext, Honey(person)
eyeofthebeholder
The Dragon(idea)
Heitah
consist, comprise, constitute, or compose(idea)
Meezzio
Gotlandssnus(thing)
argv
Astral Plane(idea)
Madara
One Winged Angel(fiction)
Tom Rook
Talk is cheap(poetry)
shaogo
Adelle Davis(person)
Aerobe
race car g sfjsgsd(poetry)
Binah
Dream Log: July 5, 2008(dream)
StrawberryFrog
Forgotten things in space(idea)
antigravpussy
velvet revolution fairy tale(idea)
Heitah
Nerve agent VX(thing)
Pavlovna
shite(idea)
This affordable entertainment brought to you by The Everything Development Company