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How to be invisible

created by adoxograph

(idea) by adoxograph (4.9 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Thu Mar 30 2000 at 4:17:55

Work retail. I'm not quite sure how it gives you the power of invisiblity, but apparently it does. I have been standing at the Information Desk, under a giant sign that labels me as Information, there I am staving off boredom by any means necessary, the Keeper of all Knowledge, and watched customers walk right past me to ask other customers where books were.
Hello?
I've been trying to determine exactly what causes the invisibility factor and I believe it has something to do with our badge, or Press Pass as corporate wants us to call them now. If I'm on a break and not wearing one, invariably on my way to the bathroom, someone will come up and ask "Do you work here?" I, having way too high of a work ethic for a job like this, will invariably answer yes and try not to visibly cross my legs while waiting twenty minutes through a long abstract apology for imagined helplessness for the question "Where do you keep diet books?" On the other hand, I could be wearing a badge, a store shirt and be shelving books and people would go out of their way not to ask me a question - instead grabbing some other employee on their way to the bathroom.
The exception to this - if you are going to be inconvieniced in some dramatic way by your customer, you are no longer invisible. For example, while carrying a handful of obviously broken glass from a destroyed snow globe that had been kicked into the Children's department to avoid detection, I was stopped by no less than four customers needing assistance. The three employees at Info were standing around at that moment with nothing to do.
Human nature amuses me to no end.

(idea) by current (7.9 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) Mon Aug 14 2000 at 9:26:49

There seems not to be a true state of invisibility but there is a way to become invisible. And be invisible.
This is called mediocrity. No one notices mediocre citizen among other mediocre citizens.
to be invisble, be medicore.
Then again, I wonder if there is a way to become visible again.

(thing) by mrichich (1.4 mon) (print)   ?   (I like it!) Sat Sep 02 2000 at 14:56:30

This is actually the title of a recent book by a guy who calls himself J. J. Luna--he's apparently some sort of consultant who helps people disappear. He apparently did some cloak-and-dagger stuff while living in Spain during the Franco regime (he was evading Franco's government).

The book talks about some simple things like never allow your real name to be associated with your home address, and talks about buying things in the name of trusts or LLCs, and having your mail delivered to ghost addresses. He also talks a little bit about computer security but is obviously not well-versed in such things.

It's a fun read, but I had a hard time taking it seriously. First of all, you get the distinct feeling he's not telling you the really good stuff, and it would be extremely difficult to have to live your life this way, he's quite paranoid about stalkers and government agents and private investigators (in fact, the book's really about how to avoid private investigators), and his ideas ultimately hinge on being able to unconditionally trust a few people to handle things like mail and your legal business. That's the critical flaw in his system--you need toadies. Contrast with the Evil Overlord stuff.

The one suggestion I liked was having your vehicle registered in the name of a trust or LLC so when the DMV sells their data other people don't have it.


(idea) by ergates (6.3 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) Sat Feb 24 2001 at 4:50:35

On a lighter note, I have often found that the best way to be invisible in a useful or fun way is to work on the fact that if someone isn't looking at you they can't see you. If nobody can see you then by my (admittedly twisted) logic you are invisible.

This is a theory I try to use in everyday life. I have learned that whilst it is usually very hard to remain invisible to everyone, it can be very easy to remain invisible to one or two people. A perfect way to escape from that old "friend" you never really liked. Stay behind them, tiptoe, and try not to giggle. Ignore the fact that everyone else in the shop/street/whatever is giving you dodgy looks - they cannot be expected to understand. Best attempted in large groups for a real challenge, although it is possible that you may be arrested for intimidation if you get spotted.


printable version
chaos

How to disappear completely and never be found Advantages an invisible man would have in the world How to Disappear Completely Names that should never be given to important files
How to give a blow job How to smoke without getting addicted No one seems to listen to what I say Do you work here?
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And Now for Something Completely Different The awkward quiet of hospital hallways How to fight and not get your ass kicked LLC
Good girls who look like bad girls Monty Python retail Outing
When averted glances become the same as a stare How to hide My eyes see not your sights: The Awakening and traditional views of femininity Vampire$
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