Everything2
Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Full Text
Everything2

I signed up for the carpool for all the wrong reasons and now I'm bitter as Hell

created by donfreenut

(idea) by donfreenut (1.6 d) (print)   ?   7 C!s I like it! Tue Dec 05 2000 at 16:51:02


Tell us about the cassette.

The first time I carpooled with him, he seemed really nervous, so I asked him what he liked to listen to in the morning. He said he had one thing he liked to listen to in the morning. He made me hold his coffee cup so he could get the tape out of the glove compartment. Of course he had to reach right between my knees to get it.

Was that the first of the sexual advances?

I don't know if you could call that a sexual advance. I mean he was just trying to get the tape and everything.

Go on.

He said the music helped him concentrate while he worked on that big database thing.

Tell us about the database.

I didn't get much of what he said. He kept talking about some virtual pet that eats people. He said some days he just sits around and watches the thing devour people all day long. It was pretty gruesome, actually.

Did he ever mention a swinger friend?

The porn star? Yeah, he kept trying to get me to go to computer camp to be in dirty movies. There was one time when he said he and the porn star had ripped a bunch of stepper motors out of floppy drives, and they were going to use them to make a rotating bed.

Why did you agree to carpool with him in the first place?

Same reason as always - money. (laughs) And his car. I mean, have you ever seen his car?

Ironic.

What?

Nevermind. Did he ever offer you money in return for sexual favors?

You mean backrubs? Why don't you just come out and say it?

Okay, for backrubs, then.

Yes. Once.

What happened?

He brought out the cassette, of course. He said it made him feel more like himself. Can I go now?

One more thing: please state your age.

I'll be 13 in February.


this lesson in pipelinking was brought to you by cigarettes.


printable version
chaos

Houses of the Holy I killed my father, I ate human flesh and I quiver with joy Chelsea Hotel No. 2 Geek Compound
pushing up daisies Dem Bones stepper motor EDB
Robert Plant Bumper stickers about kids who beat up honor students Ace of Base backrub
node-fu genitalia for the spunky new user pipe link
People who don't smoke will never die XP Feminine hygiene products never cease to amaze Israel is a terrorist state
pipelink How would you like it if they took your subculture and made it a theme night? sexual favor White Trash Encryption Algorithm
Y'know, if you log in, you can write something here, or contact authors directly on the site. Create a New User if you don't already have an account.
  Epicenter
Login
Password

password reminder
register

Everything2 Help


cooled by WickerNipple

Cool Staff Picks
The best nodes of all time:
drawing and quartering
Jesus and faggots
seven segment display
cavitation torpedo
Why was my writeup nuked?
submerged
The Hacker's Kitchen Guide
She bruised her knee. This is how we met.
Pancho and Lefty
Like a child
Existentialists make bad boyfriends
Life is a Rock
Organ
New Writeups
WolfKeeper
Launch loop(idea)
TendoKing
Katana(person)
Wuukiee
Highly ornamental cultivars of brambles still have as many thorns as their wild counterparts(idea)
TheDeadGuy
Editor Log: May 2008(log)
everyday j.Lo
pray do not molest them(thing)
ammie
Bands Who Take Their Names from Eighteenth-century English Poetry and Prose(idea)
shaogo
Under My Thumb(review)
ammie
Rock On(person)
The Custodian
The Dresden Files(thing)
Ouzo
PETA becomes you, a proposed future(fiction)
Ereneta
Stone Soup, Part Two(fiction)
jjen
Sorrier than I ever thought I would be(personal)
locke baron
Moskva class antisubmarine cruiser(thing)
Wuukiee
May 15, 2008(idea)
locke baron
Kuznetsov class aircraft carrier(thing)
This affordable entertainment brought to you by The Everything Development Company