I leer at schoolboys as I walk into the library.

My hunger for youth wakes up. My hunger for innocent eyes.

Their matching blue uniforms. Scarves thrown carelessly around their necks. Perfect bone structures. Clean jaw lines. Laughing in complicity. Stinking up the place of arrogance, joy, and filthy words.

They pierce the air with their eyes.

They move in packs, leaning against each other, one trying harder, one moving slower.

Perfect steps. They lead perfect steps.




It is not lust.

It is envy.

A few random thoughts on my 31st year on this planet.

I still miss my grandfather, but it isn't hurting as much.

I cannot believe that my son is seven now.

Or that my daughter is nine.

I should have taken the day off.