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Long after bedtime I will wake up and sit crosslegged watching you. It is your fault for having your face.
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Tue Mar 27 2001 at 7:06:31
In a dark room I will tally them on my fingers, what I can save up and keep from today. Well today we went to a new cafe and one of us spilled the coffee in a wide muddy swath.
That's another one we can't go back to.
Or today I brought you a broken daffodil or today you did our laundry and it was the first time it had been Our Laundry. Or tonight was the first time
bed
had just meant sleep, and our air around each other is newly content and there are fewer words and it is perfect because we have begun to understand each other.
We could not betray all our shared secrets if we tried
; there is no way to recreate this day for outsiders because it only happened
once
, and only for us. We got to swim in it,
we are charmed and chosen.
All these things I put in the bank.
Sleeping your hair and your face are doing things you wouldn't knowingly let them do. You are foreign, you are
beautiful
, you half wake up and ask what is the matter, you mumble What are you doing.
Keeping you safe
I say, and my eyes may or may not fill with tears because we are living on such rationed time and every piece of it is too valuable to sleep through. This is not fear of time passing, don't misunderstand. That used to be it but now this is
an optimistic drive
to collect all the moments of you I can steal up.
I will see what I can weave
them into and see if that fabric will hold for a long long time. You won't realize what's happening; you will go back to
sleep curled toward me
. I have given myself a chill over
the sleepy planes of you
. That's how I like it. I will keep watching; you sleep.
printable version
chaos
Every time I look at this picture, I feel a little more in love
We knew there would be kissing, and breasts
You can't tell sleep where to go
Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of quarter-inch tapes
How I fell in love
Lingering on the last page,
Until today, it really pissed me off that I'd become this totally centered Zen Master and nobody had noticed
You wouldn't know it, but I think you're achingly beautiful
Things that are the most dangerous are the most beautiful
Lay your sleeping head, my love
comfort my sleepy thoughts
I'm out; I'm free. Down here the night air is purple. What do I do with it all?
The tyranny and ingratitude of the entire goddamn world
safe, reliable oil heat
This dance is called: Two People, Trying to Occupy the Same Space at the Same Time
I wrote you a letter on the bus back from the city, but that's a different kind of weary
Five minutes of forever
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