Dr. Sbaitso was one of the first popular PC voice synthesis programs/personalities. He came packaged with certain soundcards (soundblaster?)

Anyway, to talk like him (and impress every last one of your friends AND attract all sorts of women) you talk like you normally would except inhale instead of exhaling. It takes a little bit of practice because at first you can only talk in small bursts and can't control your pitch/tone for damn but if you walk around mumbling like an idiotic robot for a few days, you can get it down pretty well.

I say "you've got mail" in the voice and everyone laughs, but I don't understand why because the AOL "you've got mail" is a human male voice (isn't it?).

Have fun.

Hint: if nobody's around, you can try it right now! No, there's no reason to feel stupid. Watch, I'll talk like a robot right now with you. *talks like a robot* .. Yomyom
The SBAITSO in his name is an acronym for Sound Blaster Acting Intelligence Text to Speech Operator.

        HELLO, MY NAME IS DOCTOR SBAITSO
        I AM HERE TO HELP YOU
        SAY WHATEVER IS IN YOUR MIND FREELY
        OUR CONVERSATION WILL BE KEPT IN STRICT CONFIDENCE
        MEMORY CONTENTS WILL BE WIPED OFF AFTER YOU LEAVE
        SO, TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PROBLEMS
In addition to reiterating chunks of what you told him and ignoring your input altogether (as the best bored therapists do), Dr. SBaitso was also adept at:
  • doing recitations of text you fed him! (Except he could never get tricky stuff - my friends would be rolling in the aisles at his garblings of HHGTTG characters' names. Yes, we were easily amused.)
  • simple arithmetic!
  • changing his screen colours and font size!
  • changing his voice pitch and timbre!
  • producing amusing parity error messages in response to the input of swear words!
On top of those fabulous routines, Dr. SBAITSO would clue in and jump on certain topics if certain associated keywords and phrases were mentioned by the user. These included:
    AFRAID, ALWAYS, BOSS, CLEVER, COMPUTER, ENVY, EXAM, FATHER, FRIGHTEN, HANDSOME, HAPPY, HATE, HOW , INTELLI, JEALOUS, KID, LOVELY, NIGHTMERE, SBAITSO, SCHOOL, SICK, SUFFER, WHAT, WHO, WHY, and YES.
Woe be to the user who made the mistake of getting the good Doctor onto the topic of SEXY STUFFS; though he wouldn't have anything of interest to add on that subject, he would constantly implore you to return to it. In all honesty I think Dr. SBaitso needed to get outside more, maybe get a hobby or something.

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