Foreword

After the runaway success of "making love in Japanese", I figured it's about time for the inevitable sequel. Unlike its predecessor, this is intended as more of a hands-on guide, and I hope it will prove usable even without much other knowledge of the language. Slang, obscene and dialect terms have generally been avoided, and any gender-specific terms are flagged with (f) for female speech and (m) for male speech.

That much said, while you may rest assured that your author has selflessly endeavoured to check the content with native speakers in real-life situations, I am not a native speaker myself so use this at your own risk. Corrections and suggestions are welcome.

And a final note: love really is the international language, it is not only possible but preferable to have wild monkey sex without a phrasebook (or E2) in the other hand, and language skills do tend to take a bit of a backseat in the heat of the moment anyway. But a well-placed word or two at the right moment can still do wonders...

でわ、それで発表させていただきます。

His 'n' Hers

This is probably the toughest bit, partly because Japanese women tend to go out of their way to avoid direct references to sex organs, partly because (as in English) many common Japanese terms are either too clinically dry or obscene for use with a lover. I've given a few choices for most, the leftmost ones being the most polite/feminine forms; don't forget that you can very often substitute friendly direction words like kochi and achi.

mouth        kuchi 口
lips         kuchibira 唇
tongue       shita 舌
finger       yubi 指
breast(s)    mune 胸, chichi 乳, oppai おっぱい
nipple       chikubi 乳首
navel        heso 臍
penis        mono モノ, are アレ, chinchin ちんちん, chinpo ちんぽ
testicles    kintama 金玉
buttocks     oshiri お尻
vagina       asoko アソコ, (o)manko おマンコ
anus         anaru アナル
thigh        momo 股
calf         fukurahagi 脹ら脛
foot         ashi 足
toe          ashinoyubi 足の指

saliva       tsuba ツバ
semen        seemen セーメン, seieki 精液
love juice   aieki 愛液
sweat        ase 汗
urine        shikko しっこ
feces        kuso 糞

Accessories (Batteries Not Included)

bra          bura(jaa) ブラ(ジャー)
panties      pantsu パンツ, pantii パンティー
underwear    pantsu パンツ
condom       kondoomu コンドーム
Learn to love latex, because this is pretty much the only form of contraception commonly used in Japan.
ice          koori 氷
vibrator     baibu バイブ

Words of Action

All verbs given first in dictionary (present tense) form and then conjugated into the -te form, which can be used alone as simple informal command (namete, "lick!"). Add kure to be a bit more polite (namete kure, "please lick (me)") or ageru to say you'll "give" the action to them (namete ageru, "I'll lick you").

undress   nugu 脱ぐ > nuide
tickle    kusuguru 擽る > kusugutte 
touch     sawaru 触る> sawatte
kiss      kisu suru キスする > kisu shite
nibble    kajiru 噛る > kajitte
bite      kamu 噛む > kande
lick      nameru 嘗める > namete
suck      shaburu しゃぶる > shabutte
Not polite; using namete will usually produce the desired result.
insert    ireru 入れる > irete
fuck      hameru 嵌める > hamete
Be careful with this one!
make come ikaseru イカせる > ikasete

Terms of Reaction

First a few more verbs to describe your reactions to the above, this time with the past tense -ta form in case you need to state the obvious...
get hard  tatteru 立ってる > tatteta
get wet   nureru 濡れる > nureta
come      iku イク > itta
Yes, that is the very common Japanese verb "to go". Often written in katakana (as shown) if used in the sexual sense.


...and then some useful things to say.  A few of these have
different forms for male (m) and female (f) speech; any adjective can be
made more masculine by changing -ii into -ee.

Embarrassing.    hazukashii 恥ずかしい
The obligatory female reaction to, um, just about anything the first time around. The expected male reply is daijoubu-da or none at all.
Stop!            yamete 止めて (f), yamero 止めろ (m)
No way!          dame ダメ (m/f), yada やだ (f)
That...
...feels good    kimochi ii 気持いい
...tickles       kusuguttai 擽ったい / kusushii
...hurts         itai 痛い
...feels heavy   omoi 重い / omotai 重たい
More!            motto もっと
Deeper!          fukaku 深く
Faster!          hayaku 速く
I'm coming!      iku イク, ikisou da イキそうだ (m)
Once more?       mou ikkai? もう一回?

Tab A, Slot B

on top           ue 上
on bottom        shita 下
on back          aomuke 仰向け
on stomach       utsumuke 俯向け
sitting          suwatte 座って
standing         tattete 立ってて
The observant reader will have noticed that tatsu also means getting an erection, so this is a bit fiddly.
doggie style     bakku de バックで
masturbation     manzuri 万擦り (f), tekoki 手こき (m)
finger-fuck      yubiiri 指入り
fellatio         fera フェラ, shakuhachi 尺八
cunnilingus      kunni クンニ
sixty-nine       shikkusu-nain 69, ainame 鮎並
tongue bath      zenshin nameru 全身嘗める

Aural Sex

You...
...are beautiful.  kirei きれい
...are sexy.       sekushii セクシー, iroppoi 色っぽい
...smell good.     ii nioi いい匂い
...are big.        ookii 大きい, dekai でかい
...are tight.      semai 狭い
...are skilled.    umai 旨い

That was incredible.       Saikou datta. 最高だった。
Can I come in your mouth?  Kuchi no naka itte ii? 口の中イッていい?
Kneel and lick my feet.    Hizamazuite ashi wo o-name. 跪いてお足を嘗め。

Further References

Todd and Erika Geers' Making Out in Japanese is a surprisingly good (albeit not perfect) book for miscellaneous dating language, although the section on sex is disappointingly brief. The sequel, creatively entitled More Making Out in Japanese, goes into more detail but is less usable overall. All other "dirty" or "slang" Japanese books I've seen, on the other hand, suck (and E2's Japanese pickup lines node isn't much better).

This writeup has been brought to you by the syllables nyoro-nyoro, kyuu-kyuu and pon-pon. Thanks to Cogito & co. for comments.

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