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Petitions to the Patron Saint of Noders

created by stepnwolf

(idea) by stepnwolf (5 y) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Wed May 09 2001 at 9:00:54

lagrange, in his wu on Saint Isidore of Seville, has announced to us the joyful news that this saint is now officially the patron saint of internet users, programers and, by logical extension, noders. I'm certain that the Vatican hasn't gotten around to formulating prayers of petition to St. Isidore appropriate for our needs, so I offer the following for your consideration:

Before Clicking on the Submit Button

Most Gracious St. Isidore, who in your zeal for knowledge compiled the first encyclopedia, I beseech you to protect me from the random typographical error that may be uncovered by your representatives here on earth in the guise of editors, gods and other assorted specialists. May you, who undoubtedly cribbed from other writers in the compilation of your encyclopedia, protect us from the wrath of those who would consign my WU to a premature demise in node heaven because of our creative borrowing. Bring our modest writeup to the attention of the hierarchy who have C!s to spare and incline their hearts to generosity and good will. May they all be inspired to upvote and may our enemies fail to reach E2 when we are listed in New Writeups. Amen.

Upon Beginning a Writeup

Dear St. Isidore, ornament of the Church and indefatigable compiler of all existing knowledge, as I embark upon this creative effort in search of the perfect node, bless your lowly servant with your munificent gifts: an articulate and eloquent style to wow those with points to bestow; skill and cunning to mask my copy & pastes so that even to the most zealous guardian will fail to see the truly deviceful component of my writeup. Guide my mouse to fruitful fields of facts and alliteration upon your web so that even when data are few my pyrotechnics may dazzle, my skill will astound and upvotes shall pour in. Protect my machine from rolling brownouts and inspire me to make frequent saves so that not one insight shall be lost to cyberspace. Amen.

A Chatterer's Prayer

St. Isidore, you who presided over countless councils and summarized most lengthy proceedings, bless me, your humble, meek and unassuming servant, as I enter the catbox to communicate with my intimidating peers; bestow upon me a silver tongue, the gift of the glib remark, the insightful comment and electrifying repartee that all who read may marvel at my skill and wisdom. Save me from the gnashing jaws of EDB and may my flavor unto him be as bitter gall. When he stalks give me the gift to evade his grasp with honeyed words and innocuous remarks so that his wrath may pass over me and be as nothing.

printable version
chaos

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