Like many, I have resolved to get into better shape during 2013. The other day I was in the age 18 and over women's locker room at the gym. Exiting as I was entering was a woman and her toddler child. I've seen this woman before, and I wanted to say something earlier, but I'm glad I didn't. Whenever I'm mad, I have an unfortunate tendency say things that I shouldn't. I have a problem thinking clearly when I'm upset, and sitting in the sauna gave me some time to reflect. The real problem isn't that a small child is in the adult locker room, the problem as I see it lies in that this woman is breaking rules in front of her daughter. Her actions are sending the message that the rules apply to other people, and I don't know for sure, but I'm guessing that this woman wants her daughter to follow certain traffic rules, and do what what her mother tells her she ought to be doing.

Two of my resolutions are to be more patient, and kind, but neither of those allows for inappropriate behavior to remain unchallenged. As a member of the YMCA, I have a right to expect that the adult locker room will be populated only by women who are 18+ years of age as that's what the policy states. Going forward, this is my new plan for challenging inappropriate behavior. First, I will take a deep breath, and remind myself that I am in control of my words and actions because, as sam512 notes: "..., there are no conceivable circumstances under which it is not acceptable to be cool." Secondly, I'm going to gently remind the offender of whatever rule they're breaking. In this case, I'm going to ask this woman if she's aware that the family locker room is right next door, and she can enjoy complete privacy in a separate locked room.

Ideally this woman will take what I have to say to heart, however, if she chooses to challenge me when I speak to her, I'm going to report her to the building supervisor. If they can't determine her identity, or she chooses not to listen to them, then I have to let this go. I'm glad I had some time to think and plan, because I can only invest a limited amount of time and energy in trying to correct the behavior of others. It doesn't really bother me that this women is breaking the rules herself. My concern is that her daughter will grow up thinking that she can pick and choose which rules she would like to be following.

My children change their clothing in the designated locker room provided for girls their age, as do I. They would like to sit in the sauna, but I don't think or feel that taking them in the women's locker room would be appropriate as it is against the rules, and disrespectful to others. When they complain about other children going in and out of the adult locker room, I agree that it is certainly unfair that some people think it's okay to be breaking the rules, but I also remind them that hopefully they will make it past their eighteenth birthday, and then they too can join the ranks of more mature women in the adult locker room. Almost nothing is written about The discipline high, but doing the right thing gives you a sense of peace that those who flout the rules will never enjoy.

Namaste

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