How to answer a telephone

When the phone rings, Most people just pick up the phones and say "Hello?" Well, after a while this gets rather bland. Here's a few ways to spice it up a bit:

1. Different Languages: Saying hello in a different language is always be fun, here's a list o a few you can try:
- French: Allo?
- German: Hallo (easy enough, eh? ...apparently not! according to BurningTongues, Germans don't say hallo, they say their last name, or Ja bitte. Colour me misinformed.)
- Italian: Pronto! (Contributed by Miles_Dirac)
- Japanese: Moshi moshi (not Mushi mushi, thanks to numerous corrections ;)
- Spanish: Hola
- Finnish: Haloo? (Contributed by WWWWolf ..again, Finnish people will announce their last name or even full name when they pick up the phone, according to vuo).
- Mandarin Chinese Hwei? or Hui? ( depending on how you Romanize it. Thanks for addition blaff)
- Ebonics: Yo yo yo yo, Whuddup G-dawg?

2. Practical Jokes: Having a little fun is always good! One of my fave's is to pick up the phone, breathe heavily, then after a few momnets, ask what they're wearing. If you're going to try this one out, you might want to invest in a called-ID box first though; There's no need for your boss to find out you're a freak ;P

3. Sing to Them: One of the most fun is to serenade the caller with a medley of your choice.

4. Quote Movies: "What's your favorite Scary movie?" always works well >;-)

Finally..

5. Make Up Names: For instance, when I'm playing Quake, and someone calls, i answer: "WarMachine's Frag Shack," or if I'm feeling like a jerk, I'll answer "Pizza Hut," or something of that fashion. It's great to hear your friends stutter and mumble when they think they're got the wrong number but were SURE they dialed the correct one :P (a caller ID box is a great asset with this one too.)

Well, have fun.. and play safe.... OR ELSE!

sakico, have you been calling anyone in Tampa? You might have been talking to me.

Y'see, before we got our PBX, each line rang independently of one another. If line 1 was busy, line 2 would ring. But since line 2 was unpublished, it only rang if line 1 was busy... or if it was a wrong number.

So I was working late one night, and line 2 started ringing. I picked it up and said, "Hello, wrong number department!"

Pause. "What?"

"This is the wrong number department, sir. When people dial a wrong number, we pick up to let them know."

"Oh. Right. Uh, thanks." *click*

And people wonder why I sometimes work late...

I can’t recall where I first saw this, but it’s been around many a psychology humor site:

Hello. You’ve reached the psychiatric hotline:
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1. Repeatedly.
If you are co-dependant, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you suffer from Multiple personality disorder, please press 3,4 and 5.
If you are delusional, the voices in your head will tell you what to press.
If you are depressed, it doesn’t matter what you press – no one gives a damn.
If you are paranoid we know who you are and what you want – please hold on the line while your call is being traced.

There must have been more entries – please node them or /msg me to complete this node.