Findings:

• For all sad words on tongue or pen, the saddest are these: "It might have been."
• If you or a loved one have been injured or killed
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
• How to develop one side of your butt and still have the other one flabby
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• What Might Have Been
• The Edwin Smith Papyrus: Case One
• I'm straight, but you might be the one
• This one goes out to you - not so much the people in the audience, but more the people in my mind
• 99 problems but a bitch ain't one
• A time when a gun might have been helpful
• Conrad wants to know what I have been dreaming. This might get complicated.
• I hate to break it to you, President Bush, but $300 ain't jack
• The eyes of the dead may not blink, but they have been known to wander
• I could have been one of a two
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• I may or may not have been naked
• How to get Apache to tell your visitors when files have moved or been deleted
• a bad day is when I lie in the bed and think of things that might have been
• We have eleven toes on each hand, and we walk softly
• It was one of the worst things I have ever done
• Front porch, what should have been said
• Have you ever been so excited about your life that it makes you almost want to cry?
• The most comfortable position to assume after one has been kicked in the junk
• All Girls Should Have Been Born Blonde
• It could have been me
• Gap analysis of a telephone call
• What if I had never met you? How much the poorer would my life have been.
• AOL-Time-Warner-Disney-God will eventually get everybody's money, and no one will have to get shot
• No one has ever been bitten to death by a poisonous snake in a ball pit
• the seagulls have been walking in the salt-caked road and taste like salt now and what are they doing 400 miles from the coast?
• One problem with being born really soon after Christmas
• on being the only one in a restaurant
• If we were machines, we'd have the gift of being eternal and I want you to understand
• only by consuming pieces of one another can beings such as we exist
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me
• A tribute to dem bones, Or a spelling story
• I have a most elegant proof of that, but this node is too small to contain it
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• I love you but I have to let you go
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• Perhaps pain will stop me where good sense and virtue have failed
• I had hoped our relationship would be a long and happy one, but I'll settle for short and exciting
• judge a captain not by his shipwrecks, but by whether or not he blames the sea
• one kid against the fence, scuffed shoes, probably a trumpet case at his feet
• What do you need to transfer to say you have transferred your mind?
• God has power, whether or not one believes in Her/Him
• Just because you both have the same problem does not mean you are one another's solution
• Are you on drugs or just having one of those days?
• Ain't nothing going on but the rent
• Badgers? We ain't got no badgers. We don't need no badgers. I don't have to show you any stinking badgers!
• New zombies have been animated to replace the old
• Phone books have never been this exciting!
• Words that only have one context
• you would have been
• Things that have never been said in the entire history of man
• Coy or honestly shy, either way I have got mad designs on your dancy eyes
• Some liberties have been taken with dialogue
• Every morning when I wake up, I feel guilty for all the things I have ever been
• You have been the daylight shining
• If it had been able to, the light would have smiled
• I appear to have been misinformed
• The Meeting, or "Have a Nice Day, Mr Hockney"
• being beaten into an unhealthy state by other people's pasts
• The dangers of being open minded
• You'll be something special one day. And you -- you have to take care of your sister.
• Being stoic, Daoist, and at one with the universe is NO FUN
• There are more and better reasons to dislike a human being than race or religion
• Jack Vance
• How To Avoid Being Something Other Than What One Is Not
• Sticks and stones may break your bones, but the tongue will crush you
• Sororities are nothing but social crutches
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• I am a little concerned about my state of mind
• Using a Jedi Mind Trick on State Troopers
• I suppose I could have married a World Cup soccer player, but I didn't
• Cheers, my lips have frozen but hemlock goes down easy
• I've lost my memory but I have ink, so.
• you can lower your standards, or your pants, but you can't make them love you
• Textbooks you save because there's that one chapter in back you refer to every two years or so
• In case of accidental death, back up your state vector regularly!
• I will take one ticket please to whatever you have to say please keep talking
• Ain't nobody here but us chickens
• I sincerely hope you have one of these somewhere in your life.
• Final moments lost to what should have been
• I have always been burning
• But lately, I've been too tired to care
• Do not be surprised, I have always been your canvas, Argenis.
• I have been orbiting this planet for thirty-seven years, and am just now starting to experience reentry (document)
• I guess that I am the one who has changed
• (Are You) The One That I've Been Waiting For?
• I have been enslaved to imaginary Berlins my whole life.
• We are the people we have been waiting for.
• Oh, False One, You Have Deceived Me
• You, standing
• It must have rained or something
• Are we listening, or are we just being silent?
• The Edwin Smith Papyrus: Case Two
• Music that is either by the Sonic Youth or by some band that is ripping off the Sonic Youth, but you can't tell which
• state of mind
• But I have seen the sun just once
• With or Without You... but I prefer the latter
• Starving in the greenhouse
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• It wasn't so much what you said, or what I did, but more what you said I did, and what I didn't say at all.
• she doesn't write, doesn't tell you stories, but somehow it's her words that spring to mind at those crucial, terrifying moments, and for that you are eternally grateful
• Man's desire to blow shit up, and to have a nice attache case
• Why some mammals have an aversion to water
• Smite heathens or have a beer?
• The Manual (How To Have A Number One - The Easy Way)
• The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one
• Is You is or is You Ain't My Baby?
• I have never been sure that you knew quite how much I loved you
• Signs that you or someone you know may have a problem with drugs or alcohol
• Laugh when you have been listening well
• They are angry and they have been lied to
• Could have beens, should have beens
• The cat (rumination of all that could have been)
• Hello lovely fool where have you been all this time.
• You will be a tear-stained diary entry, and it will have been all your fault
• It has been claimed that some or all of this article or section is incoherent and not understandable, and should possibly be reworded if the intended meaning can be determined
• I have enthusiasm for everything that you like or are interested in!
• I must have been mental to have done something like that, eh?
• you have become one with The Anonymous
• Being a dickhead
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• Despite being surrounded by perverts, I manage to have a great time
• The Edwin Smith Papyrus: Case Three
• No, but I'll have a beer
• You need a license to have a dog, but any idiot can have a child
• I may have cellulite, but I can still put my ankles behind my head
• We're one, but we're not the same
• altered state of mind
• I might not believe in God, but I sure as hell believe in the power of prayer
• I don't have a soul. But something still hurts.
• in case I have forgotten
• Citing a United States Supreme Court case
• Regina v. Secretary of State for Health (Case C-491/01)
• What is a sealed indictment? Or, the case of the missing third Duke lacrosse player.
• No one asks me if I'm a Satanist or anything because I take the precaution of wearing a predominantly flannel and hawaiian shirt oriented wardrobe
• I have little or no desire to watch you perform your daily rituals
• For future reference, when in eternity or insanity; dreams I would like to have
• There ain't no black in the Union Jack
• One sock on (or: Getting caught fooling around by the cops)
• ain't nothin' but a family thing
• Animals that should not have been domesticated
• The Beowulf Poet may have been somebody else
• My one regret as of yet is that my life has been utterly tolerable
• Why do I have to call ONLY ONE country "home?"
• The bong on the table must have been part of the scenery
• Mama, You Been on My Mind
• Inventors have one hand in the junk drawer
• The Wild Colonials
• Your radical ideas about this being like David Foster Wallace have already occurred to others.
• No one dreams of being a guidance counselor
• United States Naval Jack
• There are many like it, but this one is mine
• On the one hand my life is in danger, but on the other hand, I'm getting really stoned
• This ocean is angry but I might live through it
• Susan Goldman, who has cervical cancer, is partly thankful as she braces herself but changes her mind as she's sprayed with burning jet fuel.
• Be a model or just look like one
• Eleven or One
• I still have the skull of the one that tried to bite my leg off
• You don't always have to disagree, or agree for that matter
• To One who has been Long in City Pent
• We have been shown the plan only insofar as it concerns ourselves
• I have been showing you what a warrior is not.
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• AES may have been broken
• It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.
• I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas.
• Strangers have been, and continue to be, very kind to me. Thank you.
• every statue in town came to life, but they'd been watching long enough to know better than to ever move
• How many lives could have been saved had we just said "Please" more often?
• Imagine if you achieved a higher state of being from the Weather Channel
• Eduardo Kac's GFP Bunny, a work of transgenic art, or, It's not easy being green
• at the moment i have forgotten if i am abraham lincoln or captain ahab - nonetheless i am an important figure in u.s. history
• Whether you take a doughnut hole as a blank space or as an entity unto itself is a purely metaphysical question and does not affect the taste of the doughnut one bit.
• On Being the one who goes away
• one person, one vote in a unitary state
• One Tin Soldier
• To the States to Identify the 16th, 17th, or 18th Presidentiad
• BQN: But, one for all?
• Three Golden-Tongued Knights, Whom No One Could Refuse Whatsoever They Might Ask
• I Meant to have but Modest Needs
• I've got a page one story buried in my yard; I've got a troubled mind
• Swim with the fishies, but remember you have wings
• But alas, I have no badger to offer you
• Walking down a very desolate road with only one person on your mind
• I will have her forever but I can't touch her
• You Might Think It's Sexual But Actually It's Not
• I told her I could read her mind, but she didn't believe me. I could tell.
• But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one

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