This is an extremely stupid thing to say when you're in France, because it translates literally to "I'm your father's banana." But is also the rough equivalent of, "I don't know French."

Ah, but like a most French phrases, even expressions like, "Quand la jupe de ta mère sera morte, je serai le roi de l'anana." Which, translated, reads something like, 'When your mom's skirt is dead, I will be the king of the pineapple.' It's understood though, as it is a French sentence, it really is the same as saying "C'est la vie." literally, 'Thus is life.' To wit, "Je vais tuer tout le monde" (I will kill the whole world) is as carefree an expression as "Je ne porte pas de pantalon" (I'm not wearing any pants).

J'aime manger des stylos.

I never could quite figure out what he meant by that, but I'm sure it was intended to be sociologically profound and/or to help me get broads, since it was in French.

And of course, my mother's new (improved, no less!) lyrics to the Beatles' song, "Michelle" —

Michelle ma belle
Je pense que ton maison sent comme jambon.

(Michelle, my beautiful
I think your house smells like ham.)