Near Matches Ignore Exact

Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "When I meet a woman who can reliably prove to me that she can write her name in the snow while urinating, I will stand up, walk out of the room and demand a refund on that thing between my legs"

• I a man sad, with a linux box, a slow internet connection and friends who can not see the love in me bursting to get out.
• When you can almost recognize her face, but you can't remember her name
• Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
• I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
• Who needs love when you can have death?
• When she woke up, her hands were still dreaming
• When she sleeps, is she not moving her legs aside for an unknown garrison?
• Forgive me for who I am when I wake up
• Spinning shapes like a song out of order. In the dark she can see fireflies.
• You can play with my ex-girlfriend, but treat her like the lady that she is.
• We can meet her for you wholesale: a dreaming girl's singularity
• I hope they kill me while I'm standing here, so I can die happy.
• I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
• She dumped me when she found out I'd been faking my Scottish accent
• A child who will clearly grow up to be as demented as me
• Dust mop so magic she can not believe how fun it is to clean up after people
• How can a man stand when they cut off his feet?
• up, because the sky has room for us and more than we can ever make
• we can give up, but the world never will
• while she sleeps, i write myself into her life
• I can only pray that, when I finally leave, I will have done little enough damage to be totally forgotten
• A dose of mystery slipped into her cocktail while she was in the ladies' room
• ALL WHO STAND IN MY WAY WILL DIE, BY STEEL!!!!!!!
• That balanced place where I can sit with words coming out of my fingers
• I'm so sorry my brain works that way
• What you will know in the future can affect the present
• When I think of him now I can smell horses
• You make a light in the world and you hope someone can still look up from the dust for long enough to see it
• Building a rabbit trap out of two aluminum cans
• The man who can fix anything
• Every time that I tell her that I love her, I can taste my own hypocrisy
• GammaGirl, Nothing can slow her down
• I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• They walk around her like she is in danger of breaking
• Sometimes the apathy she saw made her want to curl up and cry
• She is so beautiful, I gave up Nihilism for her
• If not me, who? If not now, when?
• She does not take her trip. She does not shout out loud.
• If I'd have shot her when I met her, I'd be out of jail by now.
• i gave her my heart. she gave me a pen.
• She picked herself up, wiping away at her dignity
• She sat down in black pants and mules, and I pulled up a chair to listen to her reading Billy Collins
• She found her bliss between the headphones, and pursed her lips.
• There is nothing growing here, in the space between she and me
• What doesn't kill you can only fuck you up for a really, really long time
• Things you can tell just by looking at her
• Shit, why am I the only one here who can perform the Heimlich maneuver?
• I can do shit with my legs
• Waiting for the tear gas in my room to fade away so i can sleep
• All right. She can fly circles around Uranus, but where's the bathroom?
• How can I talk about love when the bacon is burned and the house is an absolute mess and the children are screaming their heads off and I'm going to miss my bus?
• Can't speed up, can't slow down - all we can do is follow these damn dogs
• On the last day of 2004, we will do something in Portland. That thing is called a party. You can come.
• Tell me what you read, and I will tell you who you are
• Can you show me?
• She asked me to copy my poem into her notebook
• Every beautiful woman has someone who is tired of her
• I come home, she lifted up her wings. I guess that this must be the place.
• She grew a little older, while he was telling her
• Susan Goldman, who has cervical cancer, is partly thankful as she braces herself but changes her mind as she's sprayed with burning jet fuel.
• Now she's in my doorway, accusing me with her soft breasts and long legs, strong hips.
• Nothing can stop me now
• I can hang out with guys without fucking them!
• She walked into the room
• Sitting in the library, listening to the rain, reading an interesting book and wanting to meet the man who just walked past
• someday, when she will think back upon the time when she was as yet undishonored
• A woman will do anything if she loves you.
• Catch Me If You Can
• We CAN walk through walls since we're only 0.01% substance
• Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
• His eyes look out at me from people that I meet
• Could/can vs Would/will
• you can only make me dizzy if you're spinning me in leaves or snowflakes
• The monster stares back at me. I'm still young enough to believe that, with the right shoes, I can outrun it.
• Can You Take Me Back
• Look, look! I can write inane bullshit too!
• plain fiction that i can write myself
• she can scream so loud you'll be looking for your ears on the floor
• The video cuts out here; nothing more can be determined from the tape.
• It's dark and scary out there. The night can avenge itself.
• Robert Lionel Fanthorpe fills up the word count in a science fiction novel: she brushed her teeth
• The woman with her legs apart
• Her perception of how gorgeous she is will be evident in her lack of movement during sex
• I told her I could read her mind, but she didn't believe me. I could tell.
• she doesn't write, doesn't tell you stories, but somehow it's her words that spring to mind at those crucial, terrifying moments, and for that you are eternally grateful
• How to say "I can eat glass, it does not hurt me"
• Boy meets me, boy becomes infatuated with me, boy realizes I take up space, boy runs like hell
• A crazy ideological teenager who still thinks that clear, free, rational thinking can save the world
• dr's Hospital Adventure : nurses put up with more than you can ever realize
• When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
• Any woman who thinks she is pro-life should ask herself
• She will remember your heart when men are fairy tales in books written by rabbits
• What she writes in my diary, I will read in twenty years
• Dead links in writeups
• The If Footprints Doesnt Knock His Wife Up Pronto The Whole World Will Think He's A Homofag When You Hear This Music Band
• a soundtrack when I walk into a room
• I can photograph you while you sleep
• No Time, No Room, No Thought, or Writing Can
• If you can walk, you can dance. If you can talk, you can sing.
• i can tell you the dreaming up north is real and wide
• can u c me i guess n (user)
• It is something very shameful. Please contact me again if I can be of further service.
• from where I stand I can see they have already won
• A simple experiment that you can do at home to prove the possibility of global warming
• Is it fair for him to love me when she craves his touch?
• It is her name that I think of when I think about being in love.
• i kissed her one last time, then walked out of her life forever
• One of the most irritating things that can happen when talking
• Jay Buhner can vomit at will
• Anonymous Men Think They Can Talk To Me
• I will kill you if I can
• When can it end?
• I can make a bong out of anything
• A House Divided Against Itself Cannot Stand
• Soulmates who will never ever meet again
• If you meet a strange, confident woman, she may well be a witch
• Of all the dorm rooms in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine.
• Pokemon evolution isn't evolution
• She kissed me gently, just once, then walked away crying
• Can my nodes be used against me in a court of law?
• lots of small things can fill up a day without you even being aware of it
• What will happen to me, when you die?
• I have a small penis. How can I sexually pleasure a woman?
• You can take the mall out of the ghetto, but you can't take the ghetto out of the mall
• Can You Forgive Her?
• You can see right through me
• Famous people who can run a marathon
• at least in dreams when shit gets ugly you can still fly and whistle
• She wakes me up by tickling my feet
• Having gotten myself into a position where I can have my cake and eat it too, I feel a strong compulsion to get up from the table
• When we kiss I can hear your thoughts, so I would rather we didn't
• Can I play with your breasts? Yes, but don't get out of the yard.
• you tell me i live in a malady called imagination and i only can laugh
• I will marry only he who defeats me in battle
• I need these blue and black halos for comfort, to remind me where I am, who I am, when I am
• She Will Have Her Way: The Songs Of Tim & Neil Finn
• I will marry only he who defeats me in Scrabble
• Because I still love her, because I know she still loves me.
• Only my hours spent gaming will stand between our world and total destruction
• Getting out of a traffic ticket
• I recall the last 20 years as succinctly as I can in one node: bear with me
• Grace and Fury walk with you, call each by name when the other has failed
• Will the Real Bruce Perens Please Stand Up?
• nick can write love poems again
• You Can Count on Me
• If I can just get Mike to the 24-hour Whipper-Snapper, I will be okay.
• When water chokes you
• When you are drunk, all you can see is light
• You touched me when I needed to be touched, and for that I will hold you in my heart forever
• You can find a place inside my heart if you will stay
• Can anyone bring me some Shazbot?!
• Listen, we ended up ruined. I find my answers where I can.
• I can feel you forgetting me
• I can feel the radiation... changing me...
• I'm Harriet Harman, you know where you can get me
• I don't believe in God or the soul but these machines can make me cry
• His name came up like a match on wooden me
• In a quiet grove of pines under a frosty sky, he helped her out of the sack. She wore severe white hospital pajamas and was beautiful.
• The portion of her face she allows me to see
• She cleaned up for me at least.
• if you fear spells, look away when she decides to share her hair with the wind.
• They leap just because they can, out of joy
• She writes notes to me, to keep me in check
• It is important go out for a late walk in the new snow
• When I grow up (I want to be an old woman)
• I can own this room
• Having gotten myself into a position where I can have my cake and eat it too, I feel no compulsion to get up from the table
• Can You Fill Me In?
• Only Jesus can judge me
• Why beverage cans have concave bottoms
• Can you hear me Maggie Thatcher? Your boys took one hell of a beating
• If you can catch me, you can keep me
• Can you see the tension piling on me in waves? Look into my eyes.
• How Can You Be in Two Places at Once When You're Not Anywhere at All?
• Piero Manzoni
• You can get to my heart by making me cry
• You are at the beginning of your next trillion years, and you can spend it with us, or you can spend it curled up and shivering.

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