i'm a little
princess
sitting in my cloud of nightlit
incense
whispering to the
sleepy walls
closing my eyes, embraced by the plump arms of stasis
the
chlorinated crystal numbers above me ascend
time begins to
starstream toward me from all sides
my
ballgown is getting dirty
the edges are fraying, trod upon by
muddy workboots
i try to climb away from
the looming void
the raw and bloody wounds on my feet and hands
try to ebb away into sweet
novocane silence
but i'm not ready
i'm too
scared to fight but too naked to hide
the tongue of an empty and whirling
black ocean laps at my heels
laughing at my
indulged paralysis
the cliff before me is so steep
the tide is rising
i've climbed this wall, i have done it, but how long can i
keep going?
sometimes i just want to
drown
my
last breath a dream kissed sigh of
apathetic satisfaction
collapse against the sand like a
junkie as the world goes black
i can't believe there's a
plateau at the end of this mountain
i don't know how long i can climb.
back to
notes from the little black book