Silly Songs Quest!
"Apples are for eatin’ and snakes are for hissin’
I've heard about a'huggin and I've heard about kissin’
I read about it free in a fifty cent illustrated guide
My uncle used to love me but she died"
"My uncle used to love but she died
A chicken ain't chicken 'til he's licken good and fried
Keep on the sunny side
My uncle used to love me but she died"
Greetings, friends and neighbors!
The holidays are upon us once again and soon the streets will be filled with the hearty voices of carolers while we all gather 'round Grandma at the old piano to sing our yuletime favorites. Music, music, music! In every department store, from every car window and on the lips of every smiling face that you meet: Sweet music!
Snorting lines of snow
In a stolen Chevrolet
O'er the hills we go
Laughing all the way
Eating chicken wings
Drinking Miller Lite
Oh what sport to ride and sing
A Slayer song tonight!
Oh! Jingle bells, shotgun shells
Dead rabbits all the way
O what joy it is to drive
In a stolen Chevrolet!
-James Lord Pierpont...sort of.
During the month of January, as the head of new talent at Shiftypitch Records, I will be accepting submissions of silly songs, the more ludicrous and whimsical the subject matter the better, for a unique and light-hearted quest to open the new year!
What kind of songs? Let your imaginations run rampant! This is your opportunity to play at being the next Shel Silverstein or Ray Stevens! Let your inspiration be tantalized by the likes of Spike Jones and Mojo Nixon. Whimsy! Punnery! Parody! Filkery! Do not let the spectre of bad poetry dissuade you, but let the likes of "Weird Al" Yankovic be your muse!
Participants are invited to submit their writeups in the form of lyrics, either of original composition or satiracal interpretation of an existing work. The submissions should be both silly (light-hearted, clever, humerous or just plain odd) and should be in song format (i.e. they should be able to be sung). But that is only half of the intent of the quest!
Silly Songs Quest is very much a collaborative affair. Aspiring songwriters are highly encouraged to publish their own verses to previous submissions. The result will be a node composed of lyrical content by multiple authors. Think of The Ballad of Mark The Kramer or maybe even The Everything Poem and you will get the idea of what kind of fun this quest can be! The more collaborative verses that each participating node has published, the richer the node will be! Subsequent submissions need only to follow the pattern set up by the originator.
To this purpose, your song entries should have a distinct meter and some sort of rhyme scheme. Free-form poetry may be "hep" with The Beats loitering down at City Lights Bookstore, but here at ShiftyPitch's Recording Studio and Day Spa, that bird don't fly!
The ideal submission should have at least eight lines, but probably not more than thirty-two, so as not to discourage subsequent submissions to a participating node. Above all, entries should be clever, hilarious, and should be able to be performed and recorded!"
Filling Nodeshells for this quest is fine, but submissions attached to nodes created before the quest is strongly discouraged. The node title should be unique to the quest and in the spirit of the thing. We don't need silly songs attached to a factuals about Hydrogen for example. Writeups submitted in disregard of the spirit of the quest may be subject to removal.
/msg your local Shiftypitch Records A&R Representative with the title of the node that you have submitted your entries to be included in the Quest.
At the quest's end, every submitted and approved writeup will tender to its publisher GP equal to the total number of published writeups under each node multiplied by FIVE (5) . For example, if only a single writeup is published under a participating node, that noder shall receive 5GP. But if FOUR writeups are published under a participating node, EACH of those four noders will recieve 20GP!
IN ADDITION: All participating nodes for this quest with at least FOUR submitted writeups which follow the spirit of this quest and adhere to its simple guidelines, shall be recorded in no less than four tracks by the fabulous singers and musicians here at Shiftypitch Recording Studio and Day Spa! An MP3 of your records shall be attached to your published writeups for all to enjoy for as long as E2 maintains this feature!
Final recording approval of all submissions is the exclusive discretion of Shiftypitch Records. If the end result is completely impractical to sing, it ain't gonna move any units, and will not be recorded. Stretch limos and well-heeled escorts don't pay for themselves, son.
Silly Songs Quest 2013 will begin at MIDNIGHT on NEW YEARS DAY and run through January 2013. Any new writeup posted with a January timestamp may be submitted. Rewards shall be awarded and recordings shall be commenced at the conclusion of the quest.