I simply walked out barefoot

amongst kitten paws and rustling leaves

small bugs trying to escape winter, but never

succeeding in another year. I wonder why I've be-

come what I never suspected anyone to be. This voice

gently holding me together in the back of mind. I recognize

it. It's telling me to step slowly, put one foot before the other and

then come out into the light, and shine.

Sometimes miracles do happen. And then I realize I've just been too blind to see that it's me.

Isabelle and her protector, the dragon, the last candle. Read every word like it's the first. The only way is to forget yourself.

they didn't tell me either
and now I don't expect anyone to, not anymore
I've been saying I've had it for years, count the decades
but in the end it's another silent wall, mutely never listening
so break that one, dad said.
I could hear their expectation, their frenzy
my feet, still feeling the grip of the edge on cold toes
with the bird's heart burning in my chest, galloping
trying to break through my ribcage.
I could feel those wings folding and spreading through my
body, the only resolution to this disease.
And then I whispered another prayer

those crazy loons, staring at the gushing lights on the stage
always so amazed and gaping at the sounds of life
multiplying before their eyes - this was what they were about
nodding contently and arguing silently, voices like rot under the
carpet, red and wet it lined the entrance, what a shady hole
those crazy, crazy, crazy people
behind Isabelle, the dragon hummed a violent tone
as she was getting ready to move, do me a favour - move like
a thief in the night. the lights, all the glitter of the moment
vanished.
She stepped before the stage and lit the last candle
beast crawling up behind her, the hungry heart
so she lifted her face, her horrible eyes, the hungry heart
- you've seen this before. beware, nightmares resonating
vanishing
like a candle dipped in the darkest ocean - move like
a dragon on the hunt.

I'm pretty sure they realized their actions - too late now
it was a pun intended for memory - and she wore the silver dolphins
studded. through the water glides the girl with brown eyes
will we one day forgot all the ones we have loved more than the truth
of who they were? only answer your own prayers, not mine
and I guess it dawned upon them - happy as they could be after all
that she was not there. she never was. she never could
*
be

So many dreams. Safely stored. Waiting. All the same somehow, of bringing the heart and the hand
and saving the flowers that might grow on my hair, admired by a reflection breathing
breath-taking songs on the mirrors of this soul
They will walk off, carry the memory
all my dreams end alike
with me gone

I have possibly or still am attempting to perfect the art of writing so people believe it's somehow intelligent and relevant, but really, it's just for me. And it drove my teachers crazy. Insert rofl.

e2 to me; is completely insanely fictional at all times, with blurs of interesting thoughts. If I see something neat, I read it. Doesn't really matter what. I could do a tirade about e2 and the net in general, and why they're fun and no fun at the same time, but I'm pretty sure there should at least be a dozen nodes about those matters already written.

to those who have supported my quest to post writeups here and kept supporting my sour mood tackling weird sentences; thank you. you were right. e2 is awesome.

and to those who worry I might start making sense; seriously? whatever you're smoking, I want some.

*

*

but the dragon whispered

memory work. in 1..2...3....4 ..

Don't ask a dragon for advice. Eat your cookie crumbs. Take care of your friends. Don't pretend, you'll be found out. Brush your teeth. Wear clean clothes. Be humble, but speak up when you should. Defend integrity and compassion, shun obsession. Never become bitter. Don't intrude. Respect and accept others. Wear an open mind more than an open smile. Don't listen to the people with snake tongues.

Be kind to animals.

*

*

it takes a little
after a while, the lights flicker and fade
we turn our backs and light them a new
it only takes this much
to spend a day in the heart of anyone
whose names we never need to spell
and that takes less
because it'll always find you and you
will never have to go searching for it
it takes your blind eyes

*

She walked where they didn't have to, knowingly
unwillingly, they followed her - but always only for a little while
as her footsteps became bare and raw
and she walked with the weight of another world, personal
trapped in the blink of an eye
they bat eyelashes, but their beauty is barren to her
when her eyes lift, a heaven of stars burn
this is the path she'll never leave
Don't remember, the whisper that drove through your heart
a thousand forest fires
in the blink of an eye, with your back turned to a world of dreams
she's gone.

*

*

beware the soul readers
slowly people slide past chained doors in drowning streets
how many surreal images we count on each finger
has never mattered
they say we; but they don't mean me
beware the beast in the mirror
sliding up behind you
do not fear the silly advice they gave themselves against the world
full of new journeys down new drowning streets
soaring up the tar river comes the beast
dragon, she says. they say we; but they don't mean me
clawing its way up the tar river comes the beast
beautiful, she says. wonderful, she says. unimaginable, she says.
and speaks to a reflection they could never measure
unmistakable, she says to the dragon drowning the streets and its murky world
in the tar river
there are no secrets here, nothing for them to figure out
between the hand of her and the silken bloody claws of the beast
knowledge profane and horrifying
they say we; but they don't mean me
laughing, coughing, the dragon whispers
do not fear the silly advice they gave themselves against the world
their idle threats have never mattered
beware only the beast in the mirror
beware me
beware the soul readers