The French horn is a musical instrument tuned in F. It is a brass instrument with a conical bore, like the tuba, which produces a mellow tone. The proper way to play the instrument involves sticking your hand in the bell. This alters the pitch of the note you're playing, so the position of the hand is very important. This makes the French horn very difficult and unpredictable, but capable of some neat effects, like rips, which are like trombone glissandos, but sound a lot wilder.

You can easily tell if you're kissing a hornist if his/her lips are in just the right place, and his hand is up your bum.