The E2 Wicked Retahded Scavangah Hunt
April 27, 2002, Boston

MILLER is the shit! Without him this would not have been remotely possible. He helped me figuring out the trails, finding ways to screw with you guys, he sacrificed his voicemail message for a day, and then Saturday morning he ran all over town to double check everything we placed during the planning to make sure it was all there. So please, when you say, “wow that was a cool scavenger hunt”, remember he did a lot of it!

I have no idea how many noders showed up for this, but initially the guest list was pretty randomly divided into groups 10 groups of 7 based on the 70 noders planning to be here. We tried to pick teams to mix up people from where they were staying and traveling with, but keep a few inseparable people together, too. It was reduced to 9 teams of 5 to 6, and we had a few no-shows.

You were given 6 hours to complete everything, though it should have taken about 2-3 hours, Time was also given to teams to explore Boston not included in the scavenger hunt, or do whatever else teams wanted to do. Drinking of course was highly encouraged, and people under 21 could get into the bars during the day as most have lunch menus. Not a penny was supposed to be spent on any item! Though if you did get it, you got the points, minus 100 points for spending money (noders are broke remember!). A few point changes were made during the tallying, and only the Booty List points were made available to teams.

What they were not aware of was that for each item they picked up on the treasure trail, their points were then multiplied by that factor. Another words, if you picked up 3 items on the Copley trail, then your points would be multiplied by 3. Also, points were given for creativity to be determined by the judges. Theft was rewarded, vandalism was rewarded, goofy pictures were rewarded, and most importantly, returning the items we gave you were rewarded, such as not losing your pen, crayon, map, etc! Points were also given to the people who pay-palled me money when the original plan was to go to a Red Sox game. Since I used that money to buy the disposable cameras and give each team cash for developing, each person who gave me money got their teams a 100 point bonus!

Also, what we forgot to do was hand out miller and my cell phone numbers. Each call to either of us for help was going to be a point deduction, but since we forgot, there were no ‘Booty Calls’.

The Teams:
Italicized noders were no shows…

RED: Mitzi, ModernAngel, Metzcognizant, CowboyNeal, Sondheim, Infinite Burn
PURPLE: thefez, perdedor, liha, foxtrotjuliet, ailie, jocasta
YELLOW: chiisuta, moxie, tandex, panamaus, Phyllis Stein, kenny
TEAL: The Gilded Frame, karma debt, dmd, wonkothesane, zot-fot-piq, _the_devil_
BURGUNDY: karmaflux, indra363, girlface, czeano, cerulean
OLIVE: jethro bodine, briiiiian, pyrogenic, clampe, n-wing, yru
ORANGE: dis, disgruntledwren, dann, QXZ, walter
WHITE: void_ptr, kendall, crux, czarkahn, WonkoDSane, radlab0
BLACK: aresds, burnboy, kaytay, ideath, ccunning, hemos

The BAP:
BAP members were auctioned off to the groups for a point deduction for their previous Boston knowledge:

Chihuahua Grub was sold to team TEAL for 170 Points
Orange Julius was sold to team WHITE for 235 Points
JayBonci and SophiesCat were sold to team OLIVE for 200 Points
cowofdoom was sold to team BURGHANDY for 225 Points
donfreenut was sold to team PURPLE for 420 Points (perdedor’s winning bid yeah yeah)
FatAlbertTheta was sold to team BLACK for 225 Points
The Custodian was sold to team YELLOW for 225 Points
Herbman and Hamster Bong were sold to team BURGHANDY for 200 Points
uncleozzy was sold to team BURGHANDY for 240 Points
drunkenmonkey was sold to team RED for 425 Points

Bucket contents:
Each team was given a plastic sand castle bucket with the following inside:

5 Treasure Trail Scrolls
1 Booty List
1 Team Colored Envelope with $8 inside
1 Team Colored Envelope with a pen, a key, two quarters, a post-it with instructions and a team colored crayon
1 Map of Boston
1 Blank piece of paper
1 Disposable Camera

Each team member also purchased a day T-Pass

On To The Hunt!!!

These items are on no particular trail, but are available throughout the city. The are assigned points and will be added to your grand total. Pick up as many as you can!

Picture of something with Cheers logo – 25 points
Commonwealth Avenue street sign – 75 Points
FAO Schwarz bear – 50 Points
Nuns – 75 Points
Samuel Adams Statue – 25 Points
Street vendor giving devil horns – 100 Points

Bar matchbooks – 25 Points
Back page add of Boston Metro – 25 Points
Boston tour map – 50 Points
Butterfinger McFlurry Spoon – 1000 Points
Dunkin Donuts napkin – 25 Points
Free postcards – 5 Points
MBTA bus schedule – 50 Points
MBTA bus transfer – 200 Points
Religious zealot pamphlet – 1000 Points
Roommate ad flyer – 50 Points
Shaws/Star Market shopping card – 200 Points
Underground Restaurant menu – 100 Points
WBCN/WFNX bumper sticker – 100 Points

Big Dig – 50 Points
Lesbians, Monkeys, Soy! – 100 Points
Pr0n, Pr0n, Pr0n, Strength Crushes Enemies, Pr0n, Pr0n, Pr0n! – 100 Points (we didn’t want soy!)
Touch The Puppy – 100 Points

Special Booty:
MILLER – Anything with the words Miller on it, bring back for points to be determined by the judges, the more creative the better, no trash! Felonious acts greatly rewarded!

JAUBERTMONIKER -- JM has to work today! Suck! If you visit him at work, 10,000 Bonus Points! Directions: Take your T-Pass, go to Harvard Square on the Red Line, pick up bus #71 or #73 to the Star Market on Mount Auburn Street! Don’t get lost! Andy will verify who stops by!


Yarr mateys! The Butt Pirate Miller hated the sea and everything in 'er... So he was happy ta' find his way home to the Town of Kenmore Abbey by way of a very large neon sign... He kill hauled the scurvy dog what made that sign and emblazoned his name beneath it. Find out who's name is on that sign…
Answer: Foley Electric

Pirate Miller warn't very fond of bridges, since they be over water, but there be a bridge in the Town of Kenmore Abbey over a river filled with pike. The pirate made his mark half way across that bridge so he knew when he was close to crossin' it. Find Pirate Miller's mark upon the bridge and photograph it…
Answer: The skull and crossbones from the map was painted on the guardrail over the bridge over the Massachusetts TurnPIKE

Now, me hearties, the wonderful thing about Pirate Miller's Journey across the bridge was that after he crossed it, he would journey down lands towards a mermaid whose hands reached the sky. Underneath her lay many 'o pubs befriended by the pirates. Name in order those pubs, east to west…
Answer: The Modern, Embassy, Axis, Karma Club, Bill’s Bar, Avalon, Atlas Bar and Grille, Jake Ivory’s, Jillian’s

And Pirate Miller, after a long day of drinking the briny brews, was rather fond of catching an inning or two of the Red Sox game. Though when he stood at Gate A, he noticed that some darned trees were blocking his view of a particular souvenir he wanted... Once you figure out what Pirate Miller wanted, your final booty will be a picture of all your team members brandishing this particular souvenir… HINT: This may be tricky! remember, you do not have to pay for anything, so be clever!
Answer: You would see a giant blue baseball cap between the trees, the picture was your team wearing hats or a variation of that


Yarr The Pirate Moniker of Jaubert tended to spend all day counting out his drugs (which is why he couldn't be with you today). After a hard day's work, he was rather fond of a tasty brew, especially fond was he of the local brews. If Pirate JM wanted to stop by the big local brewery, what seasonal ale would be available today…
Answer: Sam Adams Summer Ale

Yarr, and the one thing the Pirate JM loved more than handling his cutlass in the wee hours was a good race. Sit there would he with his ale and watch them wheel their way past the finish line and hope someone would crash. Who won the male wheel chair race in 1977 and what was his time…
Answer: Robert Hall – 2:40:10

Arr! For a bonus: take a picture of all your crew on the finish line. ON, I SAY. Be creative, remember the rule on the sea is the same on land; the more noders in the picture the better…
Answer: The Marathon Finish Line is on Boylston Street in front of the Public Library

After pirate JM watched the race and hoped for the undoing of his fallen comrades, wicked guilty would he feel. So he would mosey on over to the Trinity Church and gaze upon Saints. Name the saints he would look upon, left to right…
Answer: St. Matt, St, Mark, St. Luke, St. John, St. Paul, St. Augustine

Take a picture of noders with the tortoise and the hare
Answer: The tortoise and hare are by the fountain in Copley Square on Boylston Street

On the old entrance to the Library are two statues, which Teenage Mutant Ninja Pirate's name be missing…
Answer: Leonardo

Oh yeah, and bring back a book on pirates… HINT: have your ID read, and do not less loose any doubloon!
Answer: Use your ID to get a library card and check out a book!


Avast ye bloody scallywags! Twas a long time ago that the Pirate JP set foot upon Newbury Street. And no she did not have a hot ass, but she sure as the sea be briny she liked ice cream, which is why maybe her ass twasn't so hot. Bring something back from his favorite place on a hot day that bears the name…
Answer: Bring anything back from JP Licks

Usually the Pirate JP likes to do a little shopping while she is on Newbury Street. And for her single friends, she always loved to get them the sword of the single pirate, but she could never remember where the store was. Fortunately she remembered there was a Pirate Flag, and she remembered the trail she set out for herself. Follow the Pirate JP's trail and take a picture with your group all brandishing the sword of the single pirate…

1. With your back facing the pirate flag: 17 paces forward
2. Pass between the tree and the sign, turn right
3. 34 paces forward, turn left, pass through the gate
4. Turn right, 7 paces forward, turn left
5. 3 paces down the plank
6. Turn counterclockwise 135 degrees
7. Follow the purple sign with the white arrow

Now take a picture of your group with the pirate's favorite sword!
Answer: If you follow the instructions, you would be led to a fire escape over an alley on Newbury Street. The Pirate Flag was a display in the Army Barrack’s Store, and when you turned 135 degrees you would see the purple and white arrow pointing down to Condom World on the lower level of the Newbury Street shops

You have a key, follow it to Davey Jones' Locker. Retrieve the object with your group's color on it! Then you will receive further instructions there…

HINT: look for the bubbles emerging from a fairy!
The other hint included in envelope was a post it which read:

- The meaning of life, the universe and everything….
- …7 of …
Answer: The meaning of life, the universe and everything is The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy magic number 42. 7 of … is a Star Trek reference to Seven of Nine... the answer was locker #429 in Mail Boxes Etc. From there, you received an envelop with your team’s color on it, and a piece of paper inside with the following instructions…

Fifteen men on a dead man’s chest, yo ho ho who bangs yee square drum! Find Brandon and Ricky on Newbury Street and use this piece of paper to get yon autograph!
Answer: Brandon and Ricky are two street performers who hang out on Newbury Street on Saturdays. Brandon bangs a very unique square drum. They were expecting groups of people to come up and ask for autographs!


HINT: Start at Park Street T Station!

Yellow, Blue, Blue, Green, Green, Blue, Blue, White, Gray, Yellow, White, Orange, Yellow, Red, Black, Orange, Blue, Black, Blue, Yellow, Red, White, Green... Pick up the 3rd Yellow from the left…
Answer: These colors referred to the string of free rag boxes by the Park Street T Station, all are different colors, the third yellow from the left was the AutoMart classified cars listing

Yarr, the four most dreaded pirates of Boston are buried nearby. Find the place where Samuel Adams, Peter Faneuil, Paul Revere and John Hancock rest eternally. In your bucket you will find a crayon and a piece of paper, bring back proof you were there, arr...
Answer: Ideally you should have brought back some kind of rubbing from the cemetery, the cemetery doesn’t allow grave rubbings, but no one said you couldn’t rub the gate plaque!

Sea stories of years gone past tell of Ole Captain Fez, a renegade pirate who journeyed to Boston from the new of york to bury all his treasure in the city he favored best, since he figured he may get mugged back home. Go yee to the fountain and find the trap door. If you be standin' upon it, beware of the sea hags! With your back to the statue, the gilded place where the treasure is buried see you. What is that place…
Answer: By the fountain there is an access door in the ground, if you stand upon it, you look at the golden dome of the Massachusetts State House

If'n you return again to the bearded man, he be looking at an arrow on the ground. Find that arrow and follow it in that direction to the crow's nest. Once you reach the crow's nest, travel to the top. From there, the game shall lead you in the direction of your next clue. And, while you be there, take a picture of your crew on the "waterfall"…
Answer: If you followed the gaze of the bearded man statue, he was looking at the ground, but the granite work around the fountain formed an octagon, with each corner forming an arrow. The arrow pointed you to a children’s playground in Boston Common. The ‘waterfall’ was the slide. When you were in the ‘crow’s nest’ which was the top of the playground, if you looked down, you could see that one of the tables below had a granite chess board inlaid in it. On the Queen’s spot was a sharpied arrow which led you to the bronzed mine

When you have reached the mine, look for the herbed lady nearby, have a noder sit in her lap and take a picture…
Answer: Next to the bronzed mine is the Soldier’s and Sailor’s Monument. Quite a few feet up is a woman holding some kind of ‘herb’. You were supposed to climb up and sit in her lap and take a picture


Argh! Mayor Curley was a dreaded pirate who ruled over the plaza of gov'ners. They bronzed his statue and put two of him around the Faneuil Hall area. Find the Mayor and take a picture of the bloody scallywag
Answer: Across from City Hall on Congress Street is two bronzed statues of Mayor Curley. One standing up and one sitting on a bench

If you notice, the fatter Curley is looking at another statue, the 2002 New England Patriots kick ass, so does this other patriot of beer statue. Find it and find out when the man was born…
Answer: The fat Curley is looking at a statue of Sam Adams over in Faneuil Hall, he was born in 1722

The original shoreline that the Boston pirates stepped foot upon is right by the patriot. Find the original shoreline, find the dates for the original lots and the original shoreline…
Answer: Engraved into the granite around on the ground the statue are two lines, the original Boston shoreline (most of downtown Boston is a landfill) which was in 1630 and the original lines of lots and streets in 1819

Find the giant doubloon under Quincy Market and find its owners…
Answer: Saturday April 27th was the annual street performers auditions. That day between noon and 5pm street performers were standing on a giant seal in front of the entrance to Quincy Market. It reads Josiah Quincy and Kevin White.

Find JJ Donovan's Tavern. Then, half a wheel's number of merchants down, find the pirate who killed a man, and left his head staring at: MAT-TB0O HINT: Use your quarters!!! You'll get further instructions here!
Answer: JJ Donovan’s Tavern has a ship’s wheel in the window with 6 spokes, half of that is 3. Three shops down has a display window with a bronzed skull in the display. The skull is looking at a bank of phones. The clue MAT-TB0O was to dial that number with the two quarters provided in the bucket. When you called that number, you reached Miller’s voicemail with the following instructions:

Look to your left and proceed in a straight line to the Magic Hat’s door. About face and walk 3 paces forward, turn right, walk 15 paces, you will see 38, find 42. Within 6 steps of 42 you will “Detex”, err… detect a key. Pose with the key!
Answer: When you reached the Magic Hat door, turned around, turned right and walked 15 paces, it would bring you to a section of the elevated Central Artery. The I-beams that support it are numbered. You were at number 38, you had to walk around the corner and behind Faneuil hall to I-beam number 42. When you reached it, hidden on the side of a building was a small key chained to the wall. It was labeled, Detex Watch Station. Detex is the name of the security company that patrols Faneuil Hall. The key is chained there to let the rent-a-cops swipe their little time clocking machines to make sure they are doing their rounds!

The Results!

RED: 99,540 Points
YELLOW: 139,775 Points
BLACK: 115,375 Points
ORANGE: 48,625 Points
PURPLE: 59,975 Points
WHITE: 100,415 Points
OLIVE: 83,475 Points
BURGHANDY: 82,260 Points
TEAL: 48,625 Points

chiisutamoxietandexpanamausPhyllis SteinThe Custodian • kenny

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