Many new industries are emerging already in the wake of mysterious and unidentified plague for which we had ZERO warning. One of these that I am heavily investing in is the People Herder 5000. A major improvement over the 1953 version, People Herder 2000, this sound-based device renders people unable to resist, destroys them at the soul level, and prepares them to work for the good of business and industry with no need whatsover other than an ocassional kneel down at the feeding trough (working people are LUCKY to get that much - if we can finally be honest with each other here), and this can be filled with a supply of rotten seed corn at minimal cost to business and industry.

Your ruling class will need a steady supply of cheap labor with absolutely no will to resist in order to rise from the ashes like the brave phoenix of old. To do this, other methods such as genital dismemberment have been routinely discussed in corporate circles. Bringing on thousands of soulless workers with dead eyes is absolute paramount to our return to age old glory. You can help us with this by not only submitting, body and soul, but in mutilating your own genitals in advance so that you are not distracted by what are routinely called "animalistic leanings" (an extremely common spiritual weakness found in the poor and working classes).  They will live to work. There will be no other avenue. You will do this for the good of America and the ruling class. There is only America. Other countries are, as they have been from the beginning of time, fake news. If you don't believe me, just try to actually find someone, ANYONE, who doesn't live in America. There is no one out there. Fake. Non-existent. Trust me. You will NOT find a single soul.

Which brings us back to the equation and the product I am investing in and promoting for future economic growth, the People Herder 5000. How does it work? We break down now into discussion groups in which no dissent is allowed. Come with me. Now.

Just like you, it makes me want to vomit when people protest "unfair working conditions" (absurd liberal myth - check the books on it - there has NEVER been unfair working conditions ANYWHERE - NO documentation exists because it is IMPOSSIBLE for it to exist). To head this off at the pass, like Lone Ranger and other heroes, we must bring workers to heel and execute the rabble rousers that fill their heads with wrong ideas. Remind them they are lucky to have a job. The alternative is no job. They may not realize that. And then, turn on the People Herder 5000 to snap the will to resist out of them.

What it does is emit a horrifying sound that cuts through the central nervous system and causes a complete breakdown of bodily systems. At that point, a specially trained People Herder 5000 doctor moves in, takes out their heart, and replaces it with a baboon heart. Now, with no will to resist, they can be taken via livestock truck to a factory, a farm, a textile mill, and so forth where they can put in an honest 24 hours of work per day, every day. The feeding trough will be available at certain times only and it will double as the urination trough for the supervisors. It is a win-win situation for everyone.

So, what I need now are investors. For $70,000 a month, $144,000 for couples and families with children, you can get in on the ground floor of this exciting and positive new invention. Early investors will receive a special commemorative pin and a windbreaker with "People Herder 5000" and a logo on the chest of it. Please send uncancellable checks to Berhardt Illych Goats, General Delivery, Utica, New York. I generally hang around there much of the day questioning post office box users to the point where they absolutely snap. Just love following them out to the parking lot and punching them in the face while laughing. I should make a video of it and release it. Could keep people entertained during these dark days.

Remember, together we can rebuild this world that the liberals destroyed. And then we can bring back good music as well. Brighter days are ahead, my friends! God bless.

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.