Different from earn your bullshit.
We all have all these defenses. We are afraid. We are afraid of each other's emotions which REALLY means we are afraid of our own emotions.
Emotions can be stuffed. In the body.
The body is like the deepest ocean. It is huge. It can hold a lot. But it doesn't like to.
The emotions are not random. They are not inappropriate. They are not illogical. They are not annoying, stupid, too strong, too weak. They are information. They are neurons and hormones and communication.
Maybe they are our body's cells communicating with the conscious brain.
I am scared.
I DO NOT FEEL SCARED. FEAR IS THE ENEMY. FEAR IS THE MIND KILLER.
I am still scared. But I will try to keep quiet about it and hold it. So now I will hold very very still and try to lock that in place.
I FEEL NO FEAR. I AM IN CONTROL. FEELINGS DO NOT MATTER.
You don't love me. It hurts to hold and hold and hold this.
I CONTROL MY FEELINGS WITH MY LOGIC.
I cry. It hurts so much.
I DO NOT LET FEELINGS WEAKEN ME.
I am giving up. I can't move any more. I am out of tears. Why won't she/he listen?
I I I I THINK.
I give up.