Before you knew about sex, before you discovered orgasms, what was your body's best thing? What felt the best? Gullet swears his first "tingly dream" was about Mr. Peanut. No touching, no sexual over or undertones, just Mr. Peanut, walking along handsome and dapper in his monocle and hat. Gullet woke up wanting to take a bath, wanting to be warm and wet all over.
When I was eight I had a dream that was so good it turned into my thing to think about every night when I was falling asleep. I fell down a hole like Alice, tumbling and turning in the air till all my clothes came off. I landed in a pile of something floofy and was put on a conveyor belt. As it took me through the factory or whatever I was covered in peanut butter by a big machine. Then I went through another machine that cleaned me off with soft sponges and warm soapy water. Then another one covered me in mustard and bread crumbs. Then firm bristles and cool clean water. On and on.
Falling asleep, I made up endless variations. All the spreadable and crumbleable foods, all the ways to get clean. Eventually it was people who were doing the dirtying and cleaning, but they never had identities or got turned on - it wasn't for them. It wasn't strictly textbook sexual, this wasn't about erogenous zones - rather, I experienced myself as one erogenous zone, the enjoyment of my whole body, my first quiet all-over arousal.