Clarissa (smiling happily): Isn't this restaurant nice Madge?
Madge (looking around critically): It does seem quite elegant, Clarissa.
Waiter (pouring ice water into their glasses): Hello ladies, what can I get for you?
Madge (looking worried): It's so late Clarissa, maybe we should just have a sandwich?
Clarissa (rolling eyes): Oh bother, Madge--I'm feeling quite peckish!
Madge (sighs): Very well, let's order.
Clarissa (grinning triumphantly at the waiter): What's today's special?
Waiter (smilining benevolently): We have a very nice beef tongue sandwich on special today, ma'am.
Clarissa (smiling happily): That sounds delicious.
Madge (with a moue of distate): Yuck--I would never eat something that came out of an animal's mouth!
Waiter (smiling blandly): How about a nice egg salad sandwich?
(I know it's a very old joke. Let the downvoting commence!)