1. Don't whine
  2. Be as specific as you can. If you know the proper terminology, use it. Example: 'Netscape won't print my Hotmail' versus 'The stupid thingy button isn't working.'
  3. Speak to us as peers, not as your minions ('Well, i'm sorry the campus network is down, but I have a very important .gif I need to look at!'). Some people like to be addressed as though they are your intellectual superiors, but that unavoidably leads to resentment, which leads to user revolution, and that's just ugly.
  4. Read the signs. Follow the rules. Don't make us babysit you.
  5. Don't hold us personally accountable for everything that goes wrong with your computer. Example: 'I got tired of the little hourglass thing, so I hit a bunch of keys, rapidly, in no particular order. Now all I've got is this blue screen with a bunch of gibberish on it. ...Well, no, I didn't save it. You can get it back for me, right?'
  6. Don't monopolize shared resources (like printers). Someone gets pissed at us because of it, Then we have to tell you to stop and you get pissed at us, and that's one more person than is generally pissed at us about the same issue at a time.
  7. Never say 'I'm computer illiterate.'
  8. Don't waste our time unless it's really slow. Example: 'Gee, sir, i'm sorry you can't remember your Napster password. I'll come help you with that just as soon as I put out the fire in the Commodore lab.'
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