The Indian Rug Burn
is a time-honored rite of passage into childhood
. To execute properly, you must find a friend
who has not yet had an Indian Rug Burn perform
ed on them. To find this out, typically one may ask, "Hey, you wanna see an Indian Rug Burn?" in an assuring yet slightly excite
d tone. If said friend looks apprehensive
and starts to back away hastily, look for another "friend". If said friend says, "A what?", then you may proceed to the next step.
First, have the friend extend their arm about waist height toward you.
Next, step to the outside of their arm and take whichever hand is farthest away, and place it on their extended forearm.
Making sure that your pinky is next to where the wrist meets the forearm, grip the forearm lightly.
Additional gripping may be necessary if your friend begins to struggle. If struggling becomes uncontrollable,
you may need to abort the rug burn until later at which time a Sneak Indian Rug Burn may be performed.
If all is going well, place your second hand as close as possible to your first hand on the friend's forearm and grip firmly.
You are ready for the final stage, but lets take a look at what you should see. You should be standing to the outside of your
friend's arm. Be careful that you are not standing to the inside of his arm, because after performing the Indian Rug Burn, some
people have the tendency to flail about with their free arm towards your face. Be cautious of these people, they may be rabid.
You should also have both hands, side by side, thumbs touching, gripping your volunteer's arm with the appropriate force. If this
is so, proceed to the final step.
With a slightly wicked gleam in your eye, and a round of laughter that lets your friend know how much fun this is going to be,
rotate your right hand towards you and your left hand away from you in a wringing motion until you see the wondrous look in
your friend's eyes. Wring a little bit longer. Run.
For more wonder, grip tighter, twist slower.
There you go, you have now completed the Indian Rug Burn. With practice, you should be able to perform this technique in one fluid motion.