I will try to tell about the the different members of the Belgian royal family. I am not a
royalist, but I will try to explain the opinions of the common
Belgians in a few lines.
Disclaimer : no one in Belgium expect them would want to call their kids Baudouin, Leopold, which are pre
medieval stupid names.
King Albert II, named after his heroic grandfather
King Albert I, is know to be perfectly uninteresting. He cannot speak without a government member to countersign his sayings so his opinions can't be deeper than "happy xmas", "hate is bad" or "love each other". He is said to like
american motorbikes, and to have
parkinson's disease. He had multiple
affairs back in the 60s, and is said to have at least one
bastard child,
Delphine Boël. Boël being the name of the billionaire who married the mother to cover his pal Al.
Queen Paola, from
Italian origins, is particularly disliked by the
flemish population, because she doesn't speak a word in
Dutch. She also had affairs in the
60s and
prince Laurent is supposed to be the son of an Italian businessman, who eventually also
fucked the grandmother of a friend of mine, also called Laurent.
Prince Philippe,
heir to the
throne, is known to be a very quiet guy, and to be no very bright. He didn't seem to locate his dick until he was 39 and he married
Mathilde d'Udekem d'Acoz. He once said
paratroopers were the nation's elite. He was uncle
King Baudouin's spiritual child, and was by most expected to follow him, altough this had no constitutional ground.
Princess Astrid, called after her grandmother
Queen Astrid, shares a
characteristic with uncle
King Baudouin/Boudewijn : she is ultracatholic, married to an
Habsburg who is a member of the
opus dei. She has produced four kids so far. The daughter is particularly
UGLY. in the early 19
90s the
constitution was changed in order to allow women to become ruling Queens. This was done under influence of
King Baudouin who wanted to avoid that a bastard like
Prince Laurent ever could become King
Prince Laurent is the funniest guy in the family : he speeds on the
highways, fucks
Bekende Vlamingen like
Wendy Van Wanten, and cares for animals through his
Prince Laurent Foundation. As a
bastard he is the only one not to get money from the tax payer.
Princess Mathilde d'Udekem d'Acoz was introduced when
Belgium's international image was very low because of the
Dutroux paedophilia scandal and the
dioxine scandal. She was definitely marketed a a new
Lady Di and it seems to work a little, now the international press only wants to talk about her, and beatiful and simple (errr) she is, and forget the scandals Belgium was known for. She has one and only one function : produce a heir to the throne
Died :
King Baudouin (Boudewijn) was too young when he became king, and was too much influenced by the
church. His wife,
Fabiola de Mora y Aragon, was known to be more catholic than the
Spanish Inquisition and the pope together. In april 1990, Baudouin, who couldn't get kids -part because Fabiola was sterile, part because fucking is a sin, mostly because he was more a representative of the church than one of the people- refused to sign the
law that authorized
therapeutic abortion. The government made a
constitutional stunt to avoid proclaiming the
Belgian Republic and he remained King till his death in 1993.