Drawbacks of the use of elephants as assault weapons.
1.
Size
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Elephants are very big. They are also very heavy. While this combination of qualities is very efficient when applied to enemy forces, the average Joe Elephant is also very easily
panicked. You do not want a panicking elephant in your front ranks to pull a 180° on you and steamroll over your own precious troops instead of over the enemy. Trust me on this one.
2.
Historical precedent
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Hannibal's megalomanic
elephant fixation didn't really help him when he was freezing his nuts off in the Alps. Sure, it sounded like a cool idea at the time, but as Hannibal shamefully had to admit later: "On second thought, the elephant doesn't seem to be a migratory animal after all."
If you still have doubts about elephants not being migratory, go to your local zoo. Go to the elephants place. Now, choose yourself an elephant and look it squarely in the eye. Do you notice that look? It's
pining. It's
pining for the Jungle. It's a home-sick elephant!
3.
Endangered species
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While elephants were once abundant, with Elephas maximus happily roaming the Asian plains and Loxodonta africana with Africa its playground, now unfortunately only a few elephants remain. Bad men came and killed them for their ivory. POW! Bullet through the head. Saw off those tusks! Another wad o' cash to throw on the pile. Leave the corpse for the vultures. Now hurry up 'cause while we're here I'd still like to shoot me some tiger. I heard their balls are a powerful
aphrodisiac, and I'd like to bring back a souvenir for the Missuz'.
GGGGRRRRRRRRRUUUUUUWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGggggggghhh WILL HUMANITY EVER GROW UP????
...Sorry... I got a little carried away there...
Let's get on with the drawbacks.
4. Good
memory + bad
temper
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Elephants are known for their extremely good memory. They never
forget a face. If you order them into battle and they get shot at, hacked upon and poked into, they are bound to be a little cross and bad tempered the next time you cross their path. Don't think they won't recognize you, because they will! Don't be tempted to think 'I won't ever see those cannon-fodder elephants again, anyway.' because one day you'll be walking down a
dark alley on a rainy night, all alone, and you won't even know that the sudden strange, kinda' grey&heavy, dropping
sound coming from somewhere right above you was, in fact, an old friend dropping by!