Paper Toilet seat covers are one of the better toilet-related products ever invented. I'm not sure how well they actually protect you from germs and disease, but anything is better than putting your bare ass on the same hunk of porcelain that 500 other people have sat on in the same day. My only complaint is that it is always so damned difficult to get the little perforated center piece out of the toilet seat cover ring.

I was just in the restroom going pee pee and staring at this thing above the toilet that claims it's "Provided by the Management for (My) Protection", and of course, it's empty. So it dawns on me, not only have I never used one of these rediculous things, I don't think I've ever thought about the existence of them before...

Do people actually use these things? Is it fun to sit on slippery paper while you're shitting? I don't really mind putting my ass on the toilet seat after I wipe it off (the toilet, I'm confident my ass is pretty clean...) - maybe there are paranoid creatures out there who do... Probably those same people who wash their hands before and after they use the bathroom.

So I thought I'd node the existence of these things - my clever new discovery. "Hell, maybe someone will respond with the truth of these miracles - a new way of life," I'm thinking.

But Seumas beat me to it.

Seumas uses Paper Toilet Seat Covers!

And you know what? It's still pretty unlikely I'll ever get around to cramming one of those under me they next time I crap on someone else's dollar.