I got McDonald's today. Fourth time in three days... these Monopoly promotions have a funny way of making me buy food that I would normally have a high distaste for. Those fries aren't made out of potatoes, I swear. Of course, the hamburger isn't really made out of cow meat either, and the chicken nuggets are probably processed plastic... Actually, everything but the fries are tasty, but I digress.
On the outside of my McDonald's bag today was the relatively new advertising motif featuring the annoying "I'm lovin' it" tagline. God, seeing it written makes the three note jingle run through my brain. Anyways, mine had a cute little girl getting her hair brushed by a woman who was ostensibly her mother.
"Look mom, I'm just like you...
...I'm lovin' it"
My first reaction was a snide comment: "Yeah, you're gonna get fat like her too!" Of course, neither the mother nor the daughter was fat, nor Destiny's Child on the other side (I wish I was joking about Destiny's Child getting pulled for this stuff).
Of course, that was also the exact moment that I realized that... "I'm eatin' it"
After the ensuing crying fest ceased, I opened my bag and proceeded to scarf down some fries and the sandwich, all the while not noticing one crucial detail: there were no Monopoly pieces on my Diet Coke (yes, very funny, I ordered a Diet coke with my large-sized meal) or the sandwich box, both of which were advertised to have Monopoly pieces. I was outraged. For the first time in three days, I realized just what I had put into (into, and not through, this was McDonald's, not Taco Bell) my body to have a tiny shot at winning something I could most likely pay for with the cash I was wasting on the food, not to mention the medical bills. Realization turned to shock, which turned to anger, which turned to denial, which turned to acceptance, which finally coalesced into a food-induced haze of sluggishness.
Could it get any worse? Well, if I was a bit more proactive, I would have driven straight back to McDonald's and demanded an explanation. That would probably net me my deserved monopoly coupons, but would also likely put me straight on the downward spiral back to eating McDonald's again. Thus, by being lazy, I am saving myself more gluttony and heartbreak.
I'm cured. I'm not eating McDonald's again during this promotion, and probably not for a while. Thankfully, that still leaves plenty of other fast food options open; as I'm headed to New York this weekend, White Castle is in my future. It's probably a blessing that they don't have any of those around here... I'd be there all the time.