My shoe and its primary use last night

I was lying there trying to sleep. I was used to the sound of mice before I discovered they were rats. Then it started to annoy me; these aren't the big rats that you see in movies, they are pissy little rats that resemble overgrown mice.

I have used the 'three strike' rule before... it is where something that annoys you is given three chances to stop, and if it reaches the three strike limit you are supposed to take action. I spent the whole night just lounging around, then I retired at one o'clock. Sleep didn't come as fast as I'd hoped, because I could hear a loud scratching at the foot of my bed. I thought I could take it, so I lay there. Half an hour later and I was getting annoyed. The scratching would stop for a minute, go for a minute, stop, go.

"Three strikes," I said out loud, "and then I get up."

The noise continued until I got to three strikes. I didn't expect to do anything but scare it away, and when got up and turned on my light, there was (naturally) nothing there. I sat on my pillow at the head of my bed, and as luck would have it a big (compared to the others) rat crawled out from under my bed and was edging past my shoes. An not the way you'd expect a rat to move. This bitch was slow.

I took the oppertunity for revenge with much gusto. I picked up my shoe, and with a gutteral roar threw it with amazing accuracy and force at the rat. SPLAT! Right in the neck! I was overjoyed! The rat's back leg twitched, and then it lay still.

I got the rat, put it in an old box with a lid (that I used to have all my basketball cards in) and went inside to show my mum. By this time it was almost two o'clock, and my mum thought we were being robbed. She turned on her light and I opened the box, and then told her the whole story. She was impressed, but more ashamed of our rat 'problem'. I went outside and put the box on my front porch. Very, very, stupid idea.

I got up this morning, and guess what? Gone. The box was on its side, and the rat was gone. I was a little let down, I had thought it was dead. Maybe my cat got it? Maybe. Or maybe it was just playing dead the whole time? I will never know. Either way, my shoe is now considered by my family as a deadly weapon.

Watch out rats. Let me sleep, and this will never happen again.