Downwardly mobile career move for actors. In the hierarchy of the theatre, shares the bottommost rung with the usher, the box office manager, and the janitor. Salivates at prospect of NEA grant. Will gladly sell out to Hollywood for health insurance. (Playwrights typically work on a contract basis and do not receive employee benefits)


A Supposedly True Story

Neil Simon shows up at his 20th high school reunion. An old classmate comes up to him, greets hims, and says "So what have you been doing all these years?"

"Well, I'm a playwright."

"No kidding? So what does that pay?"

"I do all right."

"Don't be embarassed. Tell me. How much did you make last year?"

"About a million dollars."

"Wow. As a playwright. I tell ya, that's what I shoulda done."

Source: Koppett, Kat. "I Oughta Be a Playwright," The Storynet. August 2000. <http://www.thestorynet.com/archive/playwright.htm> (28 May 2002)