I suppose I'll just have to be the best damn
life-support system for a
penis that I can be. I
come loaded with all sorts of
nifty non penis related features. I make
vegetarian sushi. I
node Unfinished Stories. Yes, there are
billions of penis life support systems on the market... but the
discriminating consumer will settle for nothing but the best.
This just in!
For a limited time only you can get your
f1r3br4nd PLSS at a BIG, big
discount. Don't wait till he completes his
college education and gets all
expensive and
picky; get him now while he's
desperate!
Call now, operators are standing by.
Order now and, just like it says, you get a
Daz Eddy. Plus, if you call within
five minutes, you get this set of
Ginsu Knives at no extra cost... oh, waitaminute. Maybe we don't want them thinking about Ginsu Knives.