Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten. Please, think of the kittens."

• Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten
• Every time I see a dead fish that isn't, I think of you. Happiness keeps washing over me like a wave. What do I do with it all?
• I think of you every time I cry
• God, do you think I can have a nephew this time?
• Nagato in summer will kill you every time
• every mosquito you kill makes mosquitokind smarter
• the right kitten
• Kitten on fire
• God died a long time ago
• love changes color, I think, over time
• Time Travelers please help!
• God Loves, Man Kills
• Rate My Kitten
• Looking for a kitten
• The smell of kittens that have been careless; the flowers and the beer cans emerging from the snow.
• Why not to stick a kitten in the microwave
• What doesn't kill you can only fuck you up for a really, really long time
• Time and God
• the kitten principle
• Kitten
• It's all in God's time
• Every Man for Himself and God Against All
• I think it's time to find a way outside
• Will somebody please think of the children?
• Kitten Scouts of America
• Purrfect Fit Kitten Mask
• fool every time every day i
• Violence puts the smackdown on genitalia every damn time
• What we think we know can kill us
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• A God Pleased By The Odor Of Burning Flesh; A God Who Burns Human Flesh, Eternally
• Every single day is its own apocalypse. Every time we fall asleep is an extinction.
• Do you want a kitten?
• kitten launcher
• Nutty: The Kitten with Testicles for Legs
• Leave My Kitten Alone
• sex kitten (user)
• Kitten Killer (user)
• Love Kitten (user)
• Integrating a kitten into a household with toasters
• please keep your feelings inside the vehicle at all times
• Every time you see me, I need a hug
• You think time is moving fast now, just wait til you're 26
• You can't please all of the people all of the time
• Quartet for virus, kitten, miso and crucifix
• They grow bigger every time they witness something bad.
• Words which mean more than you think they do at the time.
• an emotional sad-sack with a kitten heart
• God can't be all good and all powerful at the same time
• If you press your ear to the wrist of the world you can hear every heartbeat from the beginning of time
• I'm not religious, but I think I have a close relationship with God
• My cats think I'm a God
• every time i breathe
• Kill time before it kills you
• Time and the Gods
• Nostalgia filled our lungs every time we inhaled
• I shudder when I think that God is merciful
• I would like for love not to kill me, please
• E2 killed my dog, and I don't think it's fair
• High Time to Kill
• Please God, make me a stone.
• How To Win Every Sporting Bet 100% Of The Time
• The average male thinks about sex every seven seconds
• His collection of substances that should not exist was stolen. The thieves then killed themselves 1000 times over.
• Bonsai Kitten
• Every time I fall, I fall a little bit harder, a little bit further, I fall right back onto you
• It's mean to hide a kitten in a puppy's butt
• Kitten with a Whip
• woe kitten
• Every time I look at this picture, I feel a little more in love
• kitten (user)
• Robot Finds Kitten
• Then you could make out every time there's a Jewish holiday!
• Bonzai Kitten
• Cy (kitten)
• nympho kitten (user)
• Everywhere Is Kitten Trouble
• Schrödinger's Kittens and the Search for Reality
• kittens
• every horse can be tamed by someone. but they don't always live at the same time.
• How to get a kitten out of your bedroom
• Alley Kitten (user)
• Kitten Scout Law
• Kittens Game
• if you're so evil eat this kitten
• You can't see a man die hundreds of times and not think him immortal
• All of your ideas have already occurred to others. Please stop bothering to think. You are selfishly wasting energy and oxygen.
• The Scarecrow Takes Time to Think
• Time travel, as I think of it, will never be invented
• Well at least this time I don't think you're dying.
• Hurry up please it's time
• kitten pile
• someday, when she will think back upon the time when she was as yet undishonored
• To Think of Time
• Every hour wounds. The last one kills.
• Prayer to Every God
• 'Tis time, I think, by Wenlock town
• God gave a loaf to every bird
• Kitten dynamics
• God Time
• Every day we stray further from God's light.
• How many times has God twiddled his thumbs before he put vertebrates on the Earth?
• The Weddings I have Performed, or Why God is Gonna Kill Me
• God won't take the time to sort your ashes from mine
• How To Think About God
• They think I'm a god
• Oh my god! They killed Kenny!
• God is a pretty girl across the bar who smiles and waves in your direction; and you think she is waving at you
• So this one time, God walked into an inn...
• I feel guilty every time I wear the Superman shirt
• I think I killed it
• If I had the money I would get lost. God knows I have the time.
• God was in the west too, at one time.
• If you could go back in time and kill Hitler, would you?
• Someone please kill me
• A Time to Kill
• Please Don't Kill the Freshman
• Playing 'Name that driver' to kill time and stay awake
• we meet on the street for the first time every day
• Please Kill Me
• To activate god mode, hit tab three times and double click me!
• every time you zap a wand of nothing, a stranger falls in love
• I saw a kitten
• handles on kittens
• When I went back in time to kill you
• The Trial of Eureka the Kitten
• The cute kitten represents violence and carnage
• You were a bookmark to the time when I loved every sunrise
• A Dirge for a Righteous Kitten
• Malicious Kitten (user)
• Daisy Kitten (user)
• Eulogy for a Burnt Kitten
• The Christmas Kitten
• Wonderfully cuddly kittens
• You'd think a cookie killed his dog
• Death to wretched Japanese kittens
• Being licked to death by kittens
• Integrating a kitten into a household with cats
• The cute kitten represents violence and carnage and, if he is lucky, the children look.
• pile of kittens
• Everything2 as a 300 pound kitten
• Kitten users' manual
• Kitten in a bag
• Your job is to find kitten. This task is complicated by the existence of various things which are not kitten.
• sex kitten
• Kitten with wet feet on a tile floor
• Rascally Kitten (user)
• The time I nearly killed my friends
• For every rich man who tries to leave this world for a better one with his fancy tomb surrounded by mourners, there are many more who perish alone in the cold, forgotten by all but God.
• I feel like every time I sneeze, I disappoint you
• Every time that I tell her that I love her, I can taste my own hypocrisy
• kitten shower
• Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and start slitting throats
• What if kittens grew on trees?
• sea kitten
• kittens (user)
• Thanksgiving Kitten
• Kitten on the Keys
• Why I cry every time I hear the Barenaked Ladies sing
• Every tool is a weapon if you hold it right
• every so often
• Statistics every writer should know
• There's a sucker born every minute
• treat every moment like it's your last
• Two Sides To Every Story
• There are two sides to every bet: a crook and a fool
• A computer in every home and on every desk
• What kind of OS changes its name every 6 months?
• There's one born again every minute
• Looking as though they saw the dark before dawn every day
• Just Empty Every Pocket
• Every beauty is a tragedy waiting to happen
• every tragedy is a beauty that has passed
• Three sides to every story. Yours, mine, and the truth.
• Every poem is a silence that needed to be broken
• Every minute dies a man
• Inside every Mr Man...(lessons in sexual identity at McDonald's)

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