honey

I heard that awful song from 1968 on the radio today. Bobby Goldsboro had everyone in tears or on the edge of a toilet; there was no in between.

See the tree
How big it's grown
But it hasn't been that long
It wasn't big.

Since Goldsboro wrote a lot of his other hits, such as "See the Funny Little Clown," many assumed that he also wrote Honey. Wrong.

The songwriter was Bobby Russell. Russell also wrote "Little Green Apples" for O.C. Smith as well as "The Night That the Lights Went Out in Georgia." Either of these beats the hell out of Honey.

Honey, I miss you
And I'm being good.

That being said, in ancient times, honey was applied to wounds for healing. Today, the Honey Research Unit at Waikato University, New Zealand, specializes in research on the antimicrobial properties of honey. Clinical observations and experimental studies have established that honey has effective antibacterial and anti-inflammatory properties. It painlessly removes pus, scabs and dead tissue from wounds and stimulates new tissue growth. "Randomized trials have shown that honey is more effective in controlling infection in burn wounds than silver sulphadiazine, the antibacterial ointment most widely used on burns in hospitals" says Dr. Peter Molan, Professor of Biochemistry at Waikato. These trials used sterilized honey. (Source: National Honey Board)

Honey is primarily composed of fructose, glucose and water. It also contains other sugars as well trace enzymes, minerals, vitamins, amino acids, and digestive juices from bees' stomachs.

Bees may visit two million flowers to get enough nectar to create a single pound of honey.

In terms of colouring, her ears, head and body are gray, with her face, paws, and belly being white. She has giant big blue puppy dog eyes, with felt zig-zag eyelashes sewn on for accentuation. She also has light grey spots on her paws and fluffy pink and white bows on her ears.

After years of longing after what I thought was Sad Sam, I was finally given a Honey pup for Yule this year. She's about 6 inches tall, and when you squeeze her belly, she lets out the cutest puppy dog whine. Somehow, when repeatedly excessively, the whine is still cute.

She stares at me as I write this, with a warm, black knit cap on her head that I put on her to make her just a dash more ghetto. I don't want an innocent, vulnerable, cute pup to be victimized. This is the Bronx, after all.

And yes, I animate all of my stuffed animals. :)

What is it?

Honey is perhaps the oldest sweetener in the world, made by bees from the nectar of various flowers. Honey varies in colour, density and flavour and this is attributed to the type of flower that was the main food source for the particular hive of bees. Honey is a complex of different carbohydrates, trace elements, vitamins and amino acids. It has been documented as having healing properties as well as being good to eat and was of great importance in Ancient Egyptian times as a sacrificial offering to the gods. Indeed, honey has been found sealed in Egyptian tombs which is still edible today, with very little loss of quality.

Types of honey

A true connoisseur of honey will delight in the large variety of single flower honeys available, each having its own unique characteristics of density, colour and flavour. Most of the cheaper honeys available in the shops are blended from a variety of sources. The list of types of honey is very long, so I have only mentioned a few:

• Clover honey was once the major type of honey found in Britain. It is very pale and aromatic, although it quickly granulates once the jar is opened. The use of clover as a crop has declined greatly over recent years, leading to a reduction in the amount of clover honey produced.
• Acacia honey is a pale, runny, mild flavoured honey, produced primarily in Hungary, Yugoslavia and Romania. Its high fructose content means that it remains liquid for a very long time.
• Heather honey is dark, rich and fairly thick.
• Australia produces a variety of extremely high quality and good flavoured honeys. Eucalyptus honey is very strong with a slight medicinal aftertaste.
• Orange blossom honey, produced in Florida, California, Texas and Arizona is very pale amber and has the distinctive aroma of the flower.
• Mexican honey. Mexico has become one of the leading countries making honey worldwide.
• China is a major exporter of good quality honey, supplying about 20% of Britain's needs.

How honey is made

In the early morning scout bees fly from the hive in a radius of up to 1.5 miles searching for food sources. They then fly back to the hive and the best nectar is sampled and selected. The 'chosen' honey bee then does the waggle dance - a figure of eight movement which provides a map for other bees to follow.

When the bee reaches a flower it inserts its long tubular tongue and sucks the nectar into its honey stomach, which takes anywhere between 100-1500 flowers to fill. (Bees have 2 stomachs, one to collect and store nectar, the other being its regular stomach)

The bee then returns to the hive where other worker bees, or 'house bees', suck the nectar from its honey stomach through its mouth. The house bees then 'chew' the nectar for about half an hour so that enzymes from their saliva break down the complex carbohydrates of the nectar to simple sugars which are both more easily digestible and less prone to bacterial attack.

The resulting liquid is put into the cells of the honeycomb and then evaporated until it is thick and syrupy. The bees fan the cells with their wings to aid evaporation, until a concentration of about 60% sugar is reached. The cells are then capped with wax and the honey is safely stored until needed by the colony ( a colony can consume between 100-200 pounds of honey a year) or extracted by man.

refs:
http://www.beefarmers.co.uk/vofbeesreport.htm
http://people.netcom.co.uk/m.turner/howdo.html
http://www.pa.msu.edu/~sciencet/ask_st/073097.html

The process of extracting honey from the bee animal is a complex one which involves tiny metal tweezers, and this is why the Roman Empire was so famed for its intricate metal-work; the only sweetness in Italy and the Mediterranean at the time of Christ came from the honey bee, because Sugar Puffs had not yet been invented, because tea had not yet been imported from China and there was no incentive for the ancient Romans to extract sugar from... the sweat of the Honey Monster. Can you see how the path of human invention is made up of little connections? Without the invention of tweezers, there would be no way to fondle the breasts of the bee, just as without the invention of rope there would be no hangman's noose, and beneath the pavement, there is a beach.

Leather was, of course, widespread at the time of Christ. The Bible has many accounts of Jesus' leatherwear, of the straps and harnesses he wore whilst building houses and painting things and so forth; it is often forgotten that the art of carpentry is a tough, physical art, a direct art of the heart, and Jesus would never have attracted the following he did without his carpenter's hands, his strong hands, like a doctor's hands. There is much in common between the two, Jesus and Howard Dean, the one a doctor of houses, the other a carpenter of general medicine. I mention leather because it was often used to strap the bees down, lest they sting the milker. This explains the origin of Blue Öyster Cult's most famous song, "Don't Sting the Milker", a big hit in the late 1970s. I have never seen a blue oyster, neither have I been part of a cult.

Sadly, whereas a cow can be milked again and again and again - I have seen this, and I know it to be true, the cows love it, they love it - a bee can only be milked once. It then enters a period of deep depression, after which it dies. If only they knew to what good their honey would be put; they would be glad to give it up. I personally am not a fan of honey; when someone mentions the word, I tend to think of the word in the affectionate sense, because I have more experience of affection than I do of honey. Perhaps it was my upbringing, perhaps it is Britain, but honey is not as widespread as it was. It is extracted nowadays from peanut oil and tree sap, there is no longer any need to milk the bees, indeed the skill has withered away; the human limb for bee-milking has atrophied.

I had never really thought to question it, until now; a breakfast snack called 'Sugar Puffs', advertised by the 'Honey Monster' - surely sugar is better than honey? Why is the monster not called the 'Sugar Monster'? This will mean nothing to my American audience. To those people I say, go here:
http://www.thanatopsic.org/losgal/european/

Hon"ey (?), n. [OE. honi, huni, AS. hunig; akin to OS. honeg, D. & G. honig, OHG. honag, honang, Icel. hunang, Sw. h�x86;ning, Dan. honning, cf. Gr. dust, Skr. kaa grain.]

1.

A sweet viscid fluid, esp. that collected by bees from flowers of plants, and deposited in the cells of the honeycomb.

2.

That which is sweet or pleasant, like honey.

The honey of his language. Shak.

3.

Sweet one; -- a term of endearment.

Chaucer.

Honey, you shall be well desired in Cyprus. Shak.

⇒ Honey is often used adjectively or as the first part of compound; as, honeydew or honey dew; honey guide or honeyguide; honey locust or honey-locust.

Honey ant Zool., a small ant (Myrmecocystus melliger), found in the Southwestern United States, and in Mexico, living in subterranean formicares. There are larger and smaller ordinary workers, and others, which serve as receptacles or cells for the storage of honey, their abdomens becoming distended to the size of a currant. These, in times of scarcity, regurgitate the honey and feed the rest. -- Honey badger Zool., the ratel. -- Honey bear. Zool. See Kinkajou. -- Honey buzzard Zool., a bird related to the kites, of the genus Pernis. The European species is P. apivorus; the Indian or crested honey buzzard is P. ptilorhyncha. They feed upon honey and the larvae of bees. Called also bee hawk, bee kite. -- Honey creeper Zool., one of numerous species of small, bright, colored, passerine birds of the family Cerebidae, abundant in Central and South America. -- Honey easter Zool., one of numerous species of small passerine birds of the family Meliphagidae, abundant in Australia and Oceania; -- called also honeysucker. -- Honey flower Bot., an evergreen shrub of the genus Melianthus, a native of the Cape of Good Hope. The flowers yield much honey. -- Honey guide Zool., one of several species of small birds of the family Indicatoridae, inhabiting Africa and the East Indies. They have the habit of leading persons to the nests to wild bees. Called also honeybird, and indicator. -- Honey harvest, the gathering of honey from hives, or the honey which is gathered. Dryden. -- Honey kite. Zool. See Honey buzzard (above). -- Honey locust Bot., a North American tree (Gleditschia triacanthos), armed with thorns, and having long pods with a sweet pulp between the seeds. -- Honey month. Same as Honeymoon. -- Honey weasel Zool., the ratel.

© Webster 1913.

Hon"ey (?), v. i. [imp. & p. p. Honeyed (?); p. pr. & vb. n. Honeying.]

To be gentle, agreeable, or coaxing; to talk fondly; to use endearments; also, to be or become obsequiously courteous or complimentary; to fawn.

Shak.

Rough to common men, But honey at the whisper of a lord. Tennyson.

© Webster 1913.

Hon"ey, v. t.

To make agreeable; to cover or sweeten with, or as with, honey.

Canst thou not honey me with fluent speech? Marston.

© Webster 1913.